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The Shepherd's Crown
The Shepherd's Crown
Terry Pratchett, Paul Kidby | 2016 | Children
8
9.0 (5 Ratings)
Book Rating
THE FINAL DISCWORLD BOOK

Those four words were always going to make a long-time Discworld reader feel quite emotional, making it hard to objectively review the novel itself: are you reviewing this last peek into Pratchett's mirror reality, or are you reviewing the entire 41-book series? I'm going to try both:

THE SERIES

The first Disworld book I read (I'm pretty sure it was [b: Pyramids|64217|Pyramids (Discworld, #7)|Terry Pratchett|https://images.gr-assets.com/books/1439098306s/64217.jpg|968512]) wasn't actually the first in the series (that would be [b: The Colour of Magic|833512|The Colour of Magic The Illustrated Screenplay|Vadim Jean|https://images.gr-assets.com/books/1347346368s/833512.jpg|17589693]), although I did later go back and read the earlier works. Reading them in order released (as opposed to one of the numerous Discworld Reading Order Guides: I'm quite partial to the 'Unofficial Discworld Reading Order Guide'), you can see how Terry Pratchett's writing style evolved, how he moved from outright satire to a more subtle comedy fantasy that holds a mirror up to real-world issues. Personally, I feel he was at his best at around the mid-way point of the series (say, [b: Maskerade|64305|Maskerade The Play|Terry Pratchett|https://images.gr-assets.com/books/1170622047s/64305.jpg|62427] or [b: Men at Arms|7557548|Men at Arms The Play|Terry Pratchett|https://images.gr-assets.com/books/1353573652s/7557548.jpg|9910828], after he'd found his feet (so-to-speak), but before the 'embuggerance' of his posterior cortical atrophy set in and the novels - perhaps understandably - started becoming almost too serious.

Throughout the series, there was a rich tapestry of characters introduced, from CMOT Dibbler through to the Patrician of Ankh-Morpork, with certain groups of characters (e.g. The City Watch) effectively becoming a sub-series in their own right. One of those groups - Granny Weatherwax (first introduced in [b: Equal Rites|34507|Equal Rites (Discworld, #3; Witches, #1)|Terry Pratchett|https://images.gr-assets.com/books/1407706800s/34507.jpg|583611] and The Witches of Lancre (first introduced in [b: Wyrd Sisters|233664|Wyrd Sisters The Play|Terry Pratchett|https://images.gr-assets.com/books/1388363090s/233664.jpg|17589683] - would later themselves have 'guest spots' in another group of such characters, ostensibly written for Young Adult Readers but still very enjoyable for older; the Nac Mac Feegles (Crivens!) and Tiffany Aching, both of who first appeared in [b: The Wee Free Men|7881001|The Wee Free Men The Beginning (Discworld, #30 & #32)|Terry Pratchett|https://images.gr-assets.com/books/1388181365s/7881001.jpg|22017239]. Which nicely brings me to:

THE NOVEL ITSELF

'The Shepherd's Crown' sees a return of both Tiffany Aching, now a young Witch setting out on her career path, and those Nac Mac Feegles. There's a strong sense of change throughout, kicked off by the surprising early exit of a previous major character in the entire series, leading to old foes - the Elves - to try to make their way back into the world. These Elves, remember, are *not* the dainty do-gooders of Tolkien: these are nasty, malicious, self-serving creatures who last attempted to invade in [b: Lords and Ladies|34529|Lords and Ladies (Discworld, #14; Witches #4)|Terry Pratchett|https://images.gr-assets.com/books/1469186110s/34529.jpg|1185086], before eventually being defeated by Granny Weatherwax, Nanny Ogg and Magrat Garlik. Those three characters make a return in this, as well as bit-parts for the Arch-Chancellor of Unseen University, Ponder Stibbons (and HEX) alongside King Verence and the Patrician. Despite all these, the novel, however, is really Tiffany's story, and of how she finds her feet in the circumstances into which she is rather abruptly thrown. There's also a plot element that recalls [b: Equal Rites|34507|Equal Rites (Discworld, #3; Witches, #1)|Terry Pratchett|https://images.gr-assets.com/books/1407706800s/34507.jpg|583611]: that of a person wanting to do a role that is generally considered to be that for a member of the opposite sex.

As always, footnotes are present and correct, with the novel even raising a few laugh-out-loud moments. While the story does finish with the words 'THE END', the world itself will continue on: all that has come to an end is our ability to peek into it.

In the words of the Nac Mac Feegle: "Waily waily waily ..."

Rating for the series: 5*
Rating for the novel: 4*
  
Emaji Nation Book 1 The Sparrow
Emaji Nation Book 1 The Sparrow
Denna M. Davis | 2015 | Young Adult (YA)
10
10.0 (1 Ratings)
Book Rating
I also found the story to be gripping and so detailed that the action never slows down for a second (0 more)
I did not really enjoy how every citizen of Emaji is described as having their own specific skin color. I understand how this may be a gift from Ema or possibly a result of the radiation from the war (0 more)
Honest Review for Free Copy of Book
Emaji Nation Book 1: The Sparrow by Denna M. Davis is a book that I will not soon be forgetting about. In fact, I was very pleasantly surprised by just how much I enjoyed this book. The first chapter grabbed my attention instantly. Most books I have read don’t do that, they tend to need some time to build up a reader’s interest. Each chapter seems to leave the reader hanging with just enough anticipation that you might find yourself staying up hours past your intended stopping time to continue the story.

With little explanation as to why young Amanda finds herself walking through a portal at her grandparent’s house and transported to the planet Emaji. This is where she meets Solomon, who helps reunite her with her grandparents. Her grandmother tells her that there is a prophecy naming her the defeater of Zorn and savior of Emaji. With the help of the Emaji leaders, Amanda learns that Emaji was once much like Earth. That is until a nuclear world war forced the survivors into Mount Hanovi where their God (Ema) united them and blessed them with gifts. Peace cannot seem to last and Zorn grew arrogant with his gifts and betrayed the rest of the survivors.

Now, Amanda has to deal with being under attack by an unknown assassin controlled by Zorn. At the same time, she must begin her training. Amanda is only given two days to train and learn about the warrior classes of the Emaji before taking her own Journey of Discovery to receive her personal gift from Ema. At the very end of her Journey she must jump from a cliff to prove her belief in Ema. On top of all this, the prophecy also names the Emaji man she is supposed to marry and she isn’t even seventeen yet.

Denna M. Davis makes Amanda a very relatable character. Amanda shows her fear and her doubts from the moment she steps through the portal at her grandparent’s house and finds herself in Emaji. Unlike many books where a character is the main focus of a prophecy, Amanda does not jump right into her Destiny and instead takes her time deciding if that is what she really wants to do. She internally struggles with the idea of being this destined hero when she could always just go back to the safety of her home. Staying on Emaji means facing danger and possible death for people she just met.

There are so many things I liked about this book that it is hard to pinpoint what I liked best. I loved how relatable and real Amanda is. I also found the story to be gripping and so detailed that the action never slows down for a second. I did not want to stop reading. Being completely honest what I liked least about the book seems almost trivial to me. I did not really enjoy how every citizen of Emaji is described as having their own specific skin color. I understand how this may be a gift from Ema or possibly a result of the radiation from the war but, I just had a hard time picturing it. Frequently, I noticed I would mentally default back to thinking in the skin tones that are naturally found on Earth.

The target readers for this book are fantasy readers starting at mature middle school age and older. There are a few different times that Amanda hints at the fact that she may have been (or came close to being) raped while at a party, so readers would have to be mature enough to handle that concept. Although, nothing of a sexual nature is actually described with detail at any point in the book. I am fully confident in my decision to give this book a complete 4 out of 4 rating. It is extremely well edited to where I only noticed one error in the entire book. Also, I found myself enjoying this book right from the start. Denna M. Davis portrayed a world different from ours wonderfully. I felt like I was actually there at times and was sad when I finished the book. I can not wait to read the second one. I am hooked and I believe anyone who enjoys fantasy will be as well.
  
Twisted Game of War
Twisted Game of War
2020 | Card Game, Fighting, Kids Game, Medieval, Numbers Game
War. The card game nearly everyone knows how to play. You know, throw a card and your opponent throws a card and the highest number wins the played cards. First one to get all the cards wins. Yeah, there’s another rule, but that’s the gist. Well what if War got a small makeover? Would you be interested in checking it out? Let’s find out together!

In Twisted Game of War players take hold of their army and attempt to defeat their opponents by capturing and converting their entire army. The winner is the player who manages to collect all of the cards in the deck and hold every soldier.

DISCLAIMER: We were provided a copy of this game for the purposes of this review. This is a retail copy of the game, so what you see in these photos is exactly what would be received in your box. I do not intend to cover every single rule included in the rulebook, but will describe the overall game flow and major rule set so that our readers may get a sense of how the game plays. For more in depth rules, you may purchase a copy online or from your FLGS. -T


To setup give each player a reference card, shuffle the deck of remaining cards, and give each player an equal number of cards. The game may now begin!

On a turn each player will simultaneously blindly draw and play one card from the top of their deck to the table. The cards are compared and the winner of the hand is the card with the higher number value. In Twisted Game of War, however, in addition to gaining the played cards the winner will also consult the chart on the reverse of the reference card. This chart shows additional results based on which suit of card bested the other suit. Possible effects include: a random card from the loser’s deck, a bottom card, the top two cards, or even each card returning to its original owner’s deck. As the game progresses, one player will eventually out-duel their opponent to win the game!
Components. This is a deck of cards in a tuckbox. The cards are normal quality and feature a brown back and numbers with different suit on the fronts. Quality-wise everything is fine. Where I have issues is the artistic design choices made for the game. The suits all suggest medieval-esque weapons and armor, and all utilizing metal as primary materials (save for the bow). However, the card backs and logo for the game seem to feature stitching, as you might find in cloth materials. This mismatch does not affect gameplay at all, but made me do the doggy head-cock motion when I noticed it. Similarly, the cards are all, well, boring to look at. Yes, they give the proper elements that are needed: suit and number. And I suppose players aren’t really looking at them too much anyway, as it’s a slightly fancied-up War and cards are played and discarded almost immediately. In any case, I feel an area of opportunity lies with the aesthetic of the game cards.

All in all this is a decent idea pasted onto a “game” that really is not much fun to play anyway. War takes zero skill and has zero choices. Twisted Game of War plays the exact same way, but has the added bonus of at least DOING something on many hands. So I suppose there is merit to be found.

When all is said and done, I still cannot see this as a “game,” as I happen to define the term personally, but I can see value when playing with children. If used with children, the game introduces the “less than” and “greater than” concepts, and children do not need to be able to read in order to play with the suit effect chart, so long as an adult or older child is able to read the results.

When I am hankering for a good card game, I simply cannot suggest Twisted Game of War with typical adult gamers. However, if I need something that my kids can get into, I may be able to pull this out and help teach them simple math and chaos concepts. I like the idea of trying to improve overly-simple games, but I think a bit more care could have gone into production here and it would have elevated this game for me. If you are searching for such a game as this, please hop over to the publisher’s website at: Mental Eclipse Games and tell them Travis sent ya.
  
Cindr
Cindr
2020 | Dice Game, Fantasy, Humor
Finally! A game to simulate dating dragons. I have been waiting for this theme all my life and it’s now a reality!! Well, okay, I have never really considered dating a dragon. But I know I would be signing up for a service app like Cindr to find my true dragon mate FO SHO if it were real. So how does a card game dragon sim play?

Cindr has players taking on the persona of a lonely fantasy creature looking for dragon love on a dating app. Players will be building their character by making choices and then swiping left or right to attempt going on dates with dragons that may be a great match. Roll the dice well and things may go to the Next Step, or even the Next Level. Roll poorly and your dear dragon date may send you home aflame.

DISCLAIMER: We were provided a copy of this game for the purposes of this review. This is a retail copy of the game, so what you see in these photos is exactly what would be received in your box. I do not intend to cover every single rule included in the rulebook, but will describe the overall game flow and major rule set so that our readers may get a sense of how the game plays. Furthermore I will be covering the game using the Solo rules (which are no different than the multiplayer rules). For more in depth rules, you may purchase a copy online or from your FLGS. -T


To setup, each player (or just yourself if playing the solo rules as I am) will choose a Character Profile card, filling in the blanks and circling choices to build their new fantasy persona. Each player will take one Try Again card that is useful during game play. Shuffle each Cindr App Dragon Profile and Whelp App Location card deck and place near each other. The dice will be placed near all the cards as well and the game is ready to begin!
On a turn a player will do each of these steps in order: Choose a Dragon to Date, Assemble the Dice Pool, Draw a Location Card, Check Dragon Powers & Location Bonuses, The Date / Roll Dice, Burned by a Dragon, and End of Turn. In the solo game players will be playing long enough to complete five dragon dates.

Choosing a Dragon to Date consists of reading the profile on the top of the deck and deciding whether to date or not. If not, swipe the profile into The Dating Pool below the deck. Players may swipe twice for free, and pay for additional swipes. After a dragon has been chosen, players will Assemble the Dice Pool by flipping the profile card and comparing with the stats they had made for their character at the beginning of the game. For each match players will receive a green die. For each value one space away a blue die, and for two spaces away a red die. Each die color has a different value of faces, but all have hearts and fires. Next the player(s) will Draw a Location Card from the top of the deck, read the front, then flip to the back. The back of the card will list any die up/downgrades and bonuses that may activate at different times during the date. Checking Dragon Powers & Location Bonuses will happen next and are self-explanatory.

Now that a dragon date has been procured and a location chosen, The Date may occur! When on the date, players will roll the four dice up to three times. The first time they are rolled is considered the Meet Up. The Next Step and The Next Level are the second and third rolls respectively. To be considered a full date, players will need to at least roll a second time. It is during The Date that players will be collecting hearts and trying to avoid fires. Three fires and the hearts are lost and the turn over. Players may stop rolling any time they wish and bank the hearts they have won to that point. The hearts then transfer to Love Points that are tracked at the bottom of the Character Profile card.


Should a player roll three flames and have no way to mitigate them, they lose all earned hearts for that round and their turn is over. They were, after all, Burned by a Dragon. The End of Turn is a cleanup phase to setup for the next player (or next round if playing solo). Play continues in this fashion until a player reaches 21+ Love Points in a multiplayer game or after the solo player has gone on five complete dates. Total the points to see who is the winner, or compare against the Love Meter card to see where you stack up.
Components. I’m just going to come out and say it now: I love everything about the components in this game. The dice are excellent and feature GOOD colors (not just boring primary colors). The app cards look like a phone’s screen and that’s brilliant. The Location cards are using a review service named Whelp, and also a stroke of brilliance. The art is amazing, save for the somewhat boring Second Chance cards, and one of the fonts is the same as my favorite game of all time – Valeria: Card Kingdoms, so I am fan for sure.

It’s no use hiding the fact that I am giddy playing this game. Even solo! Yes, I missed out on being able to date dragons from other players’ Dating Pools, but I have access to all the dragons anyway! Being able to adjust your choices during the game as a result of dragon powers or location powers is a neat twist that I wasn’t expecting. Those powers and bonuses are great and can really change the game, and contribute to an already large replayability score from me. It’s just a superb game that I love more and more every time I play it.

Cindr will probably never make my Top 10 Games of All Time, but it will most certainly remain in my Top 100 for years. Again, I wish I had not missed out on the Kickstarter for this one as I am gluttonous for KS stretch goal extras, but I am quite happy with where this game is at retail level. If you are looking for a great game with a hilarious and wonderful theme, plays quickly, and is excellent as a solo game too, then check out Cindr. You will never look at dragon dating sites the same way again. I promise.
  
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Dana (24 KP) rated Empire of Storms in Books

Mar 23, 2018  
Empire of Storms
Empire of Storms
Sarah J. Maas | 2016 | Children
8
9.4 (22 Ratings)
Book Rating
This review will have a lot of spoilers for the books, so if you haven't read it, I suggest you turn away now. This is going to be a long review!

Let's start off with a character analysis section:

The Little Folk: I loved how they gave Aelin little gifts. I want more interaction with them in the next book!!

Elide Lochan: Elide doesn't see her own strength. She has been through hell, but still knows kindness and love. She has so much hope and is loyal to a fault. She loves Lorcan, but is constantly stopped by this idiocy. She has three freaking guardian angels: Aelin, Manon, and Aedion. She is a half-witch, which is cool! She was able to withstand the torment of the wyrdkey with little side effects! She is protected by the God of Death's consort which is cool because the God of Death is Lorcan's protector. She learns from and is strengthened by her crappy past. She can STILL LOVE AFTER EVERYTHING! Also, she is such a tricky schemer and a great liar!

Lorcan Salvaterre: He is a dummy and is too fixated on Maeve to see that he can have real love with Elide. He is death-protected by Hellas-and is a great hunter. He has a heart of gold underneath all that grime. He freaking makes Elide a brace for her ankle for goodness sake! Lorcan is vengeful as f, especially when Elide is threatened. I feel like he's going to be a big help to Aelin's course!

Aedion Ashryver: He's Bisexual!!! He is so in Love with Lysandra and is a flirtatious bastard. He doubts Aelin too much and questions her all the time. I get it, but it gets disheartening. He has a bad ass shot (that sea wyvern shot though!!) and is obviously a skilled warrior. He has an interestingly complicated relationship with his father. I love the the White Wolf of the North! I love his tattoo: the knot made of the courts' names!

Lysandra: Oh my goodness, she is so freaking strong! I love her powers! She is so protective of her girls, especially Evangeline. Her Snow Leopard and Sea Dragon forms are my favorite! She can and will conquer as many men as need be (mainly in killing, not sex). She loves Aedion and is so loyal to Aelin that she would literally become her.

Evangeline: She is the innocence of the group. When she goes, the group is harder and lacks the absolute faith that everything will be alright.

Fleetfoot: I love her, that is all.

Dorian Havillard: A king without a kingdom. He is a boy with powers he has no idea how to control. A boy whose friends left him. He has to learn his powers alone like he has all his life. He is trusting but questions things-he knows when he should hold back. He loves Manon and oh my sweet goodness, that cabinet scene. He is great at riddles too!

Mannon Blackbeak: OUR QUEEN!!!! She protects her own and can let go of prejudices when she needs to do the best for her people. She is so savage! She is a great leader willing to die for her thirteen. I can't wait until she kills her grandmother. SHE WILL BRING PEACE FOR HER PEOPLE!!!!! She obviously has feelings for Dorian.

Abraxos: He is the best damned wyvern ever. Even though Manon tells him to "go hide," he finds a freaking army and saves the day!

Gavriel: He's not the best dad, but he's working on it! He is too loyal to Maeve, but he cares about people. He is a lot more emotional than I would have guessed. Lol, Uncle Kitty-Cat.

Fenrys: He is such a sarcastic little ass, but a great warrior (both in the battlefield and in bed ;D). He kinda reminds me of Cassian. His situation sucks with Maeve because both he and his brother are basically prisoners and sex objects for the queen. I hope he will find a way to break the blood bond for him and his brother to help Aelin. Also, WINNOWING!!!

Queen Maeve: She is a witch with a capital B and I hate her.

Erawan: Power hungry as hell.

Elena: She is so dumb. I get it, she made a mistake, but she was still dumb. She acts before thinking and doesn't understand sacrifice or strategy. She pushed a war onto a group of children for goodness sake!

Rowan Whitethorn: He has come such a long way since Heir of Fire. He is so emotional and a freaking worry wart, loyal and trusting as hell, but he is still bad ass. He lets his woman fight when she needs to. He embraces the past mistakes of his friends and family. He is a horny little hawk. HE IS AELIN'S MATE AND HUSBAND!!! And he is the KING OF TERRASAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Strategic as hell-the thing with the Whitethorn cousins-hell yes! When he gets his hands on Maeve, shit will go down! VENGEANCE WILL BE HIS and Maeve will die horribly!! His reaction when he found out Aelin was captured was gut wrenching! Also, I loved it when he called Aelin Milady. Freaking great!

Aelin Ashryver Galanthys: She is always 500 steps ahead of everyone else. She shuts everyone down with her witty comebacks. She lets Aedion think the worst of her because she doesn't want to get their hopes up. She is not too trusting but is willing to sacrifice herself for everyone else. "But your faces are so wonderful when I get to reveal them." WOW AELIN!! When Deanna took over Aelins super power moment-I was terrified. I hate that she has to sacrifice herself. I just want her to be happy!! I loved how she pulled all of the characters from The Assassin's Blade into this! She's bloody brilliant! Using all of those Life Debts!! Her reaction to Elide is heartbreaking. Killing all of the Valg was great! When she slipped into the Celeana person, I go so freaking excited!! She was so close to settling and Maeve had to freaking ruined it all! She could have lived forever and been so happy!

Now onto some plot analysis:

So this book had a pretty awesome start since we got a flashback to the first war with Elena and Erawan. I love the little history throughout the book! The flashbacks with Elena and Nehemia were so freaking sad. I cried when they talked about Nehemia and Aelin's respective sacrifices. I feel like we get to go deeper into the history even though this is the second to last book!

Nicknames in all of Sarah J Maas' books are so cute! I love how Aelin and Rowan call each other Fireheart and Buzzard.

Family (especially chosen and made family) is so important in all of Sarah J Maas' books. Characters are willing to die to protect those they love and I think that's something important to put into books. The fact that you can always find a home in your people is very nice to see.

Women are the ones to be truly feared in this series because they have the most power. They are all so badass and never take shit from the male characters!

The multiple PoVs were very well done. As you may have realized from my other reviews, I am not a fan on multiple PoV novels much, so the fact I loved this one is great!

I think it was really cool how each character is being guided by at least one God. I have a crackpot theory about this that connects this series to the ACOTAR series. So it is stated multiple times that the Gods want to "go home" because they are trapped, right? So what if they are our Night Court Crew? Some of the descriptions of the powers fit!

I loved how SJM described the process of the magic weilding.

There was a great plot structure and pacing.

The Mycenians are so interesting! I called it that Rolfe was a Mycenian before I got to that part!
I want to know what Rowan said to Rolfe back at Skull's Bay.

All the ships got to have fun time together. Well, except for Elide and Lorcan.

I wish we could have had Choal and Nesryn in this book, but I understand why we didn't.

One thing I didn't like was how similar some of the plot points and characters were to ACOTAR and ACOMAF. Even thought they're both by SJM, I wish there wasnt' as much overlap.

Overall, I loved this book--a few thinggs could have been changed to keep it more significantly different from ACOTAR but it was still great.

Some Quotes I loved:

"Because destroying a symbol can break the spirits of men as much as bloodshed." (44)

"To call in old debts and promises. To raise an army of assassins and thieves and exiles and commoners. To finish what was started long, long ago." (72)

"One does not deal with Celeana Sardothian. One survives her." (241)

"Even when this world is a forgotten whisper if dust between the stars, I will love you." (350)
  
<b><i>I received this book for free from Publisher in exchange for an honest review. This does not affect my opinion of the book or the content of my review.</i></b>
<i><b>Bring Me Their Hearts</b></i><b> has plenty of sass, snark and </b><b>humor laced throughout</b>, which is no surprise considering one of the biggest reasons why I loved Sara Wolf's debut novel is the sass and humor (I can now officially count on Wolf to make me laugh). This book literally starts with Zera comparing the king's worth to a <i>potato</i>.

<h2>Potatoes aside, let's talk about Sara Wolf's dive from contemporary into fantasy, aka <b>how did </b><b><i>Bring Me Their Hearts</i></b><b> do???</b></h2>
Because that is the most important question: is the book good? Is it as bloodeh as the title? Let me give you the 411.

<h3><b>If you're looking for a good dose of sass, snark and humor, count on it.</b></h3>
Zera has a comeback for <i>everything</i>. Of course, she says she can't help herself because it's how she deals with it since she became Heartless, which is essentially a witch's pet monster. If you can't deal with her comebacks, then suck it up an drop off a cliff is what she'll likely tell you. But the amount of sass is &#x1f44c;&#x1f44c;&#x1f44c; and #100percentapproved.

<h3><b>But let's be a little honest here: sometimes Isis Blake appears too much in Zera.</b></h3>
Isis Blake is <a href="https://bookwyrmingthoughts.com/blog-tour-love-me-never-by-sara-wolf-arc-review-and-giveaway/">the main character of Wolf's <i>Lovely Vicious</i> series</a> and sometimes she appears way too much in Zera. Think two people stuck in one body = identity crisis much?

Maybe I am complaining too much here because regardless of how Isis seems to appear occasionally in Zera, <b>I still enjoyed Zera's voice.</b> And I still approve of snarkcisms used. So I'll just sit in a corner and hush up.

<h3><b>Let's take a moment to appreciate a side character (really, we should appreciate most side characters).</b></h3>
Meet Malachite, who is officially one of my favorite characters of <i>Bring Me Their Hearts</i> simply because he was wonderful and had no filter for being a royal bodyguard. 11/10 would adopt.

But we all know, Ms. Wolf, that you're going to kill Malachite later on, right? And kill my feels along with it?

<h3><b>There is this weird issue of the beginning being kind of out of place but used as a lovely hook.</b></h3>
<i>Bring Me Their Hearts</i> starts us in a court before backtracking a few weeks and then continuing. <i>Please note I am a very forgetful person</i> but we're in Zera's world of Heartless and witches and then Training101 for 30% of the book. I completely forgot everything by that point aside from a potato being involved.

But it's used as a lovely hook, so I'm not exactly complaining too much (someone fix my memory please and thank you).

<h3><b>Common Fantasy Plot #2927: Got 'em!</b></h3>
Eventually, you get to the point where you see the most common plotlines aka royalty is secretly venturing out in the world of plebians to be a badass and accidentally meets potential love interest aka the main character.

<h3><b>I was expecting this to be more bloody? I did not get more bloody.</b></h3>
I got a lot of court intrigue, sass, humor, but I was expecting more blood for some reason. I got more near the end though, because Heartless are monsters after all.

<h3><b>Hold up, this is the first novel?</b></h3>
I was expecting this to be a standalone but hahaha no nice try, Sophia. Come back in the future to satiate your curiosities in book two.

<i>Bring Me Their Hearts</i> wasn't horrible if you enjoy a snarky little monster who really just wants everything to be all good and dandy (but hahaha, life isn't going to be that nice) and a nice little note tacked on the end that says, "come back soon for more!"

While I wanted a little more blood because I'm smol and evil thoughts run through my brain sometimes, this was fun to read, and I have hopes for the second novel.

<a href="https://bookwyrmingthoughts.com/blog-tour-bring-me-their-hearts-by-sara-wolf-arc-review/"; target="_blank">This review was originally posted on Bookwyrming Thoughts</a>
  
Ad Astra (2019)
Ad Astra (2019)
2019 | Adventure, Drama, Mystery
Impressive visuals, but rather disappointing as an overall package.
Like father, like son?
I really love sci-fi films with high ambitions. “Psychological” sci-fi like “Solaris” for example. And “Arrival” topped my movie list for 2016. In similar vein, “Ad Astra” is also a movie concerning attempted contact with alien life. So I had high hopes for it. But would this Sci-fi epic ultimately challenge my brain again, or end up in the “Crystal Skull” sin bin with a dodgy alien meeting?

The Plot
Set a few years into the future, Roy McBride (Brad Pitt) is the son of a legend. H. Clifford McBride (Tommy Lee Jones) was a space exploration pioneer. His picture hangs in the NASA hall of fame next to Buzz Aldrin’s. McBride senior went missing presumed dead near Neptune during a mission. The mission was to get outside the Sun’s heliosphere to scan for potential alien transmissions from nearby solar systems.

But something went badly wrong, and now the earth (and potentially all human life migrating into the solar system) is at risk from massive electromagnetic bursts arising from Neptune. Is Clifford alive and involved in the emerging crisis? The authorities send Roy on a secret mission to Mars to try to communicate with his father.

Majestic cinematography
Let’s start with a real positive. The cinematography here is first rate. Hoyte Van-Hoytema – well known for “Interstellar“, “Spectre” and “Dunkirk” – knocks this out of the park. In the same manner as “Blade Runner 2049“, many of the frames of this film could be blown up and placed on art gallery walls around the world.

Add to that some cracking film editing from John Axelrad and Lee Haugen, and some beautiful sound design and I predict the movie should feature strongly in the technical awards at the Oscars.

But “science fiction” has the word “science” in it….
I’d like to park my physics brain sometimes when I go to the movies, but I just can’t. So I really need sci-fi films to live up to the science part of their name. There are a number of areas, particularly at the back end of the film, when credibility goes out the window.

I can’t really say more here without giving spoilers, so I will leave them to a “Spoiler section” below the trailer…. don’t read this if you haven’t seen the film!

What IS this movie trying to be?
In my view the film is pretty schizophrenic in nature. This is what confused me about the trailer, jumping from a cerebral sci-fi vibe to moon buggy shoot-outs.

On one hand, its the standard (but always interesting) tale of a child abandoned by a hero-father and his attempts to reconcile what that’s done to his life and relationships. How can he ever square that circle without contacting his dad? As the film’s tag-line goes “The answers we seek are just outside our reach”.

On the other there are episodes of action that would fit happily into an action scene from Star Trek.

The two elements never really gel, leading to the feeling of the film having been written as a set of disconnected pages and the writers then saying “Hey, Jimmy, once you’ve finished making us the tea, could you just write a few lines to join those pages up into a shooting script?”. Then later, “What do you mean Jimmy you used BOTH piles of paper?!”.

The greatest sin of all
Unfortunately, the film commits a cardinal sin in my book. Those of you who follow my blog regularly might know what I’m going to say….

Voiceovers! I BLOODY HATE THEM!! It’s at the very extreme of what the great Mark Kermode calls “show don’t tell”.

Here, we don’t just have a little Brad Pitt set-up intro and he then shuts up. He just drones on and on and on with his inner thoughts. At least Matt Damon in “The Martian” got away with it by cleverly filming his video blog. And it’s not as if there isn’t a prime opportunity to use that device here! He is constantly having to talk to a computer to do his regular psychological tests! But that option is not picked up.

BIG BLACK MARK!

But the film has its moments
Bubbling under all of this are some stand-out moments where, for me, the film soared. One of them (ultimately setting me up for as much of a disappointing fall as some of the characters!) is the stunning opening shots aboard the “Sky Antenna” structure. Impressive and exciting, with falling bits of metal playing Russian Roulette with Roy’s iife.

Another strength for me is Brad Pitt. I’ve seen wildly differing views on this, but for me its a quiet but strong acting performance. There are many scenes when he has no lines, his inner (and our outer) voice gives it a miss, and he acts the socks off his peers. What with “Once Upon A Time… In Hollywood” its been a really good year for Pitt. I suspect “Hollywood” might be the one though that gets him his fourth acting Oscar nomination.

For a 2019 film, it’s actually a very male-heavy film, made more so by Pitt’s love-interest (Liv Tyler) being given virtually nothing to do other that look a bit sulky from a distance. I’m not even sure she gets a single line in the whole film! (“Miss Tyler – please sign for your script”. “But, there’s nothing in the envelope?”. “Quite Miss Tyler, Quite”).

The only decent female role goes to Ruth Negga as the Mars colony leader. Even then, she only has limited screen time and although having the title “Mars CEO” really doesn’t seem to have much power.

Elsewhere, its great to see both Tommy Lee Jones and Donald Sutherland back on the big screen again.

Final Thoughts
As any veteran RAF person will know, “Ad Astra” is Latin for “To the stars”. In space terms this is less “to the stars” and more “just beyond your front door”.

James Gray‘s film undoubtedly has high ambitions but, through its spasmodic script, never really gets there. It has the beauty of “Gravity” but none of the refinement; there’s an essence of “Space Odyssey” in places, but it never goes for the mystical angle; it has the potential to reflect the near-insanity through loneliness of “Silent Running” but never commits fully to that storyline. But if its novelty you’re looking for, it ticks the “floating monkeys in space” box!

I think it’s worth seeing on the big screen just for its visual beauty and Pitt’s performance. And as a major block-buster sci-fi film I enjoyed it to a degree. But for me it had just so many irritations that it failed to live up to my high expectations. A great shame and a frustrating disappointment.

But at least it’s great news for Richard Branson and Virgin Atlantic shareholders. They can be assured that the future is bright for their “long distance” flights in the future!
  
Charlie and the Chocolate Factory (2005)
Charlie and the Chocolate Factory (2005)
2005 | Comedy, Family, Sci-Fi
Visuals, Acting, Deep Roy (0 more)
Missing some sentimental value (I prefer the original) (0 more)
C is for Candy
Contains spoilers, click to show
And yes, I certainly mean eye candy. Johnny Depp is gorgeous despite the makeup artists’ attempts to make him seem pale and awkward. My brain isn’t working properly due to lack of sleep so I’ll just go ahead and warn you that this is more a regurgitation than a review. Read at your own risk, because I even give the entire ending of the movie away…

This is the story of Charlie Bucket, an impoverished but genuinely good-natured child. His dream is one of millions: to win a Golden Ticket, and tour Willy Wonka’s chocolate factory in the hopes of obtaining an even bigger prize. If this plot sounds familiar, it’s because you’ve seen Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory, or have read the book. I profess my ignorance, for I haven’t read the book Roald Dahl wrote, and therefore have no idea which movie version adheres more strictly to the original text.

Let’s move on by more closely examining Burton’s version. Despite some of the world’s most recalcitrant children winning the four other tickets, Charlie lucks out and becomes the recipient of the last Golden Ticket. This brings great joy to his family and even makes the bed-ridden Grandpa Joe ambulatory again. I love Charlie’s family, especially because his Dad works in a toothpaste factory but everyone in the family has nasty teeth.

The glorious day of the tour arrives and each child shows up with a parental or grandparental guardian. They are introduced first to Willy Wonka by means of a puppet show, which ends in a glorious and unintentional fire. With the smoldering puppets dying disturbingly in the background, Wonka appears with cue cards, giving the impression that the man has no idea how to socially interact. The group then enters the factory.

The first child to be eliminated from the contest is Augustus Gloop. The group has been given free reign of a room made entirely of candy. Augustus cannot resist the lake of chocolate, and he falls in. He is sucked up a tube that leads to the fudge room. Then the Oompa Loompas appear and perform a song engineered for this particular predictable tragedy.

The Oompa Loompas in Burton’s version are short, and they do not have orange hair, but they all have the same face and body. Deep Roy, the actor portraying the Oompa Loompas, deserved an Oscar for effort in my book, for the special features indicate how very involved he was with this production. The songs sung by the Oompa Loompas varied significantly from those in the older version. In fact, I enjoyed how each song of admonishment involved a specific genre of music.

Next Violet Beauregard, the competitive one, is turned into a blueberry by chewing gum. And then we have the case of the sad and supremely spoiled Veruca Salt, who ends up getting thrown down a garbage chute by some very judgmental and highly trained squirrels. After each young lady has been expelled from the contest, the Oompa Loompas say adieu with a musical number.

Throughout the film, Wonka has flashbacks about his father. It seems the elder Wonka was a dentist, and he forbade the young Willy to eat candy. Several scenes show Willy Wonka defying the will of his father, which ultimately led Willy to be a world-renowned chocolatier. Though it was nice to have this subplot as an explanation for some of Wonka’s erratic behavior, I found that I like Gene Wilder’s portrayal of Willy Wonka better. He was whimsical and strange, but the film and the actor seemed to offer no explanation as to how he got that way.

Mike Teavee, a young boy with the attention span of a gnat on amphetamines, is the last of the factory’s victims. He decides to teleport himself into a television screen, which I’m sure seemed like a good idea at the time. Teavee is shown in peril as an Oompa Loompa flips the channels. Now incredibly small, Wonka decides that the best remedy for Mike is the taffy pulling machine.

Charlie is the only child left, and Wonka ushers Charlie and Grandpa Joe into the glass elevator. According to the button, they are going up and out. Indeed, they do, eventually stopping when they crash through the roof of the Bucket house. The grand prize is revealed: Willy Wonka is giving Charlie the factory. This becomes impossible when Wonka forces Charlie to choose between factory and family. Eventually, Wonka reconciles his Daddy issues and allows Charlie’s family to stay at the factory.

The visual effects in this film were amazing. As mentioned previously, Deep Roy was incredible as the face of the many Oompa Loompas. I thought the child actors in this film were also impressive in how they perfectly captured their respective vices. Overall, this was a good film. And yet I still miss moments from the older film, especially the poem with “the grisly reaper mowing.” Call me sentimental…
  
Victim: The Cursed Forest
Victim: The Cursed Forest
2020 | Adventure, Exploration, Horror, Maze, Miniatures
I mean, who WOULDN’T be frightened out of their undies when one of their traveling mates just suddenly becomes… something else… and chases them through a very odd forest? But yet, here is where we now play. In a vast forest with danger around every curve, and a horrific presence taunting the party with the imminent possession of their very bodies. A far cry from prancing about a candied forest in an attempt to reach the summit: Candy Castle. Board games have definitely evolved, and boy am I glad for that!

Victim: The Cursed Forest (which I shall from here call simply “Victim”) is a horror survival game where players assume the roles of survivors of a plane crash. Each survivor, which in the game are actually called Victims, must race against time and nightmare fiends in order to reach the safety bunker until saviors come rescue them. However, early in the game one of their own is possessed by the lurking horror and then turns on the party to pick them off one by one. It’s up to the victims to race to the bunker and input the correct code to open its hatch to relative safety!

DISCLAIMER: We were provided a copy of this game for the purposes of this review. This is a retail copy of the game, so what you see in these photos is exactly what would be received in your box. I do not intend to cover every single rule included in the rulebook, but will describe the overall game flow and major rule set so that our readers may get a sense of how the game plays. For more in depth rules, you may purchase a copy online or from your FLGS. -T


To setup, basically shuffle each deck separately, and place the Bunker map tile in the bottom six of the stack, then split that into two stacks. Place out all the chits however makes sense for your table (organized for me, thank you), and each player chooses one of the characters to play and collects all their goodies. The Start Tile is laid down, the player minis are placed upon it and the chase is on!
Each turn the players will have several choices of actions to complete, with two actions available to be taken on their turn. Primarily, players will be Running around the map to different tiles and exploring their special characteristics. Some tiles allow players to search them for Item cards, some allow players to Decode as an action, and some also require players to pass certain tests of abilities. These tests correspond to each player’s abilities of Agility, Intelligence, Vitality, and Luck. The ability scores are different for each character and can be improved or worsened throughout the game. Character boards also will show each character’s special skills that can be used on a turn.

Once all players have completed their two actions in turn order, the last player will flip an Event card that may be active for the entirety of the next round. Sometimes these Events affect only characters on certain tile types, or even adjust ability scores and Items held. However, at the end of the second or third round of play (depending on the number of players), the ominous Curse Phase is completed.

The Curse Phase is a special one-time insert that has all players make a test against one of the four abilities. The lowest score for the test then becomes the host for the Evil that will ravage the party and wreak hell on the other players. The player no longer controls their chosen character, but immediately becomes the Evil that was drawn and now plays the game against the other players. The Evil takes their turn at the end of the round, just before the Event card is drawn.

Once the Evil enters play in earnest, the game quickly shifts from a nice exploration and map building game to a race against time to earn bunker password tokens from the Decoding tiles and avoid all attacks from the now raging Evil chasing the players. I will not describe the entirety of battle and Evil special abilities, but battle is a very simple Attack roll vs. Defense roll for one wound. When a player sustains two wounds, they are considered to have a Critical Injury and may only Crawl to another player in hopes of receiving healing or to arrive on a tile with healing properties upon it. However, a character that has been Critically Injured is ripe for the Evil’s Death Skill. The Death Skill is how the Evil is able to remove characters (and thusly players) from the game and decrease the odds of the Victims’ victory.


Play continues in this fashion of players taking their turns, then the Evil takes their turn, then the Event card is drawn as the last part of each round, until either the players collect the correct tokens to solve the hatch passcode and earn safety, or the Evil takes out the required number of characters for their victory. All this can be accomplished in a mere 45-90 minutes. Absolutely.
Components. Never having heard of Hexa House prior to arranging for this review, I had no idea what to expect in terms of components. However, this game comes in a very large box, the insert is kind of perfect (which is saying a lot, especially since it is a vacuum form), and everything inside the box is really great! I’m not really a miniatures kinda guy, but I can appreciate them. Standees are just as good to me, but I think these minis are above-average from my experience. The cards, the art style, the custom dice, everything just hits really well.

So you probably noticed my weird ratings graphic up top. Well, I will admit that my graphic design skills are, well, amateur at best. So I just created a 5 point 5 because I really feel this one is just amazing. Now, some people may have some small issues with the rule book, but please read it with a grain of salt: I believe they originate in Thai or Laotian languages and are translated to English. I didn’t have problems reading it at all, but had a couple questions. I tried playing several different ways when I had these questions, and usually just one option was really viable anyway.

That said, everything else about this game is truly wonderful. I sincerely enjoy that sudden shift near the beginning of the game where one player becomes the big baddie and comes for the rest of the players. Depending on placement and buddy systems that formed in the first part of the game, the Evil player will have either a feast setup before themselves, or have to do a bit of work to track down the characters to orchestrate their attack. I know I didn’t go into a whole lot of detail on what the Evil player can do on their turns, but it boils down to basically Hunt (run), Attack, and trap.

This base game ships with six Victims and six Evils. I have yet to see all the Evils in my plays, as the mechanic for determining which Evil surfaces is dependent on a draw of a card from a shuffled deck. That said, even when an Evil enters the game that I have played before, the players were different, and the map was different, and the placement of characters was different, so it did not feel “samey” to me at all.

I will admit that the most frustrating aspect of the game is the bunker hatch passcode. Okay, so once the Bunker tile is placed, a new component enters play: the Bunker board. A hole in the middle of the board is to house a Gate Token. This Gate Token is simply a target number that the players need to achieve using the different Number and Symbol Tokens won from successful Decode actions. The Number Tokens are simply 1-6, and the Symbol Tokens are plus/minus/multiply/divide. Therefore, in order to meet the Gate Token showing 35 players would need to gather 6 x 5 + 3 + 2. That is seven different successes at the Decoder tiles, and best case scenario has players pulling those exactly and no others. When you are playing a game that is a race against time (or death, in this instance), these little setbacks can cost the entire game – that is, if players simply cannot pass the test needed for a success at the Decoder tile. Frustrating, yes, but also a very cool addition to this style of game.

Victim has completely surprised me, and I am so thankful I had the opportunity to add this to my collection. My strong recommendation is that if you see one of these in the wild – GRAB IT. There are hours and hours of gameplay in this box, and I haven’t even touched the expansion for it yet (expect another review of that in the near future as well). Purple Phoenix Games officially gives this one a 5.5 / 6 (we NEVER do half points), but I feel like with even more plays, and with the expansion to be added soon, this may give my Top 10 list a shakeup still this year. If you are a fan of games like Betrayal at House on the Hill and Posthuman, then you need to check this one out for sure. Oh, did I mention that there is a LOT of dice rolling here too? Guess I just left that until the end for my dice-chucking lovers.
  
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Chris Sawin (602 KP) rated Midsommar (2019) in Movies

Jun 26, 2019 (Updated Jul 4, 2019)  
Midsommar (2019)
Midsommar (2019)
2019 | Drama, Horror, Mystery
When a director like Ari Aster only has two full-length features under his belt, it’s difficult not to compare his works but the truth of the matter is that Hereditary and Midsommar are two incredibly different films. Hereditary seemed to thrive on lurking in the shadows visually to assist in its dark storytelling. Nearly all of Midsommar takes place under blinding sunlight making the horrific events that unfold feel stranger and even more out of place, confusing, and bizarrely unsettling. Based on his two films though, Aster does seem to flock towards a few common themes. Grief, loss, and the inability to cope have plagued the main characters of his films while the importance of family takes a high precedence. Hereditary was more about a specific family attempting to stay together while already being in shambles and Midsommar attempts to create a new family on more than one occasion with the possibility of constant expansion.

Dani’s (Florence Pugh) life is turned inside out once a devastating tragedy leaves her dumbstruck. She leans on her boyfriend of four years, Christian (Jack Reynor), for support, but their relationship is obviously strained. Along with their friends Josh (William Jackson Harper) and Mark (Will Poulter), Dani and Christian end up going on vacation to rural Sweden. They travel to a small village where their friend Pelle (Vilhelm Blomgren) grew up and now serves as their host. A rare nine-day festival that only occurs once every 90 years is being celebrated. Josh is utilizing the trip as a means to bulk up his folklore thesis for college while Mark is more interested in partaking in the Swedish women. Christian is attempting to figure out what his thesis will be while Dani searches for some sort of guidance after such a tragic occurrence. Their trip becomes increasingly more peculiar the longer they stay as they’re forced to witness violent rituals and are encouraged to embrace the ways of a Pagan cult.

The intricate illustrations throughout the film like in the opening shot, the elongated love potion cloth, or the walls of the barn-like structure Dani and her friends sleep in, give Midsommar this dark fairy tale aspect to it that a film like Pan’s Labyrinth would be proud of. The Pagan roots of Pelle’s village and the film’s metaphorical feet being so firmly planted in such rich folklore give Midsommar this cautiously fanciful aesthetic. The film capitalizes on the nostalgic sensation of when fairy tales and children’s books were read to you as a child. There are consistent signs that things aren’t right, paranoia lurks around every corner, and the locals set off every ominous alarm in your body, but there’s that naïve part of us buried deep down that wishes for and hopes for a happy ending because cosmetically we believe that is what resides at the end of every fairy tale not written by Jakob and Wilhelm Grimm (The Brothers Grimm).

It’s also interesting observing the main and supporting characters of the film or basically all of the “outsider” guests of the festival. Pelle acts as a conduit/guide between his village and the outside world, Josh is a historian/researcher, Mark is a mocker/fool, Dani and Christian are a strained couple, and Connie (Ellora Torchia) and Simon (Archie Madekwe) are a flourishing one. According to Wikipedia, Ari Aster based Dani and Christian’s relationship on a bad breakup. Midsommar is also way funnier than it has any right to be; something Hereditary completely distanced itself from. Midsommar goes out of its way to boast about who Dani’s real family is in the film. The unified chanting, outrageous theatrics, and harmonized moaning may seem like mockery or complete insanity to some. While it is humorous at times, it seems like this is the way the locals can experience everything everyone else does as a cohesive unit. This seems relevant to emotions, hallucinogens, and even sustenance; this cult does everything together.

Midsommar isn’t going to sit right with a lot of people, especially since Ari Aster desired to be confusing when it came to making the film. With all of the drug-taking in the film being so common, Midsommar may leave you feeling as groggy and disoriented as the characters on screen. However, in between the sacrifices, the brutality, the graphic nature of the film, inbred oracles, and plethora of naked mature women moaning in unison there’s something unique and brilliant about Midsommar you can’t find elsewhere. It may draw parallels to films like Robin Hardy’s The Wicker Man and may feel like a bleaker version of The Wizard of Oz on a bad acid trip, but Midsommar is unlike any other film you’ll see this year. In a way, Dani and her friends all get exactly what they came for but the end outcome is that the majority of them bit off more than they could chew. Truth be told, you’ll never look at a bear in a film the same way again even if it does remind you of the Tanooki suit Mario wore in Super Mario Bros 3. This is the type of film where you could literally tell someone everything that happens and it wouldn’t really spoil the film for them. The context of these events is important to witness in succession and in their entirety since what each individual takes away from the film will likely differ person to person.

There’s a deliberate pacing of the film many will find too slow and uneventful as the film’s two and a half hour runtime will already feel daunting. Aster has teased that the original cut of the film was three hours and 45 minutes and he has a version of the film that is 25 minutes longer that was difficult to cut down to the theatrical cut currently in theaters. An extended cut of the film or a large amount of deleted scenes on the Blu-ray (how about that levitation sequence from the trailer?) would certainly be intriguing.

If you enjoy ambiguous filmmaking where everything isn’t explained and the film’s imagery can mean more than one specific thing, then Midsommar may be worth checking out. It is an outlandish experiment by Ari Aster that a large quantity will likely deem a failure. Personally speaking though, Midsommar is such an unconventionally different ceremonial fever dream loaded with preposterousness, beautiful cinematography, hilarity, and anxiety-fueled-dread that it’s not only memorable and bold but also the type of one-of-a-kind film experience I crave whenever the lights dim and the quiet hum of a projector accelerates into a dull yet soothing roar.