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The Comedian (2017)
The Comedian (2017)
2017 | Comedy
4
3.0 (2 Ratings)
Movie Rating
Welcome to the year 2017 …. Another year which promises to bring you HUGE blockbuster theatrical releases including long awaited sequels, groundbreaking independent films, and breakout performances from some of cinemas great veterans as well as its rookie newcomers!

Alright … alright … that’s your standard P.R. HYPE. Not that it’s entirely untrue but let’s face it, we all have a pretty good idea as to what’s in store for us this year am I right?

 Today’s film is amongst 2016s ‘leftovers’ if you will. No that that’s a bad thing. Example … leftover pizza. I don’t know one individual who doesn’t like leftover pizza. You can think of this film as such.

 The selection we present to you is the dramatic comedy ‘The Comedians’. The latest from film legend Robert De Niro. The film premiered at the AFI Fest on November 11th and will be released in theaters on February 3rd. Directed by Taylor Hackford (An Officer And A Gentleman, RAY) and written by Lewis Friedman, comedian Jeff Ross, Art Linson, and Richard LaGravenese (The Fisher King) the film features an all star cast including Robert DeNiro, Leslie Mann, Harvey Keitel, Danny DeVito, Veronica Ferres, Patti LuPone, Edie Falco, Cloris Leachman, Charles Gordin, Jim Norton, Gilbert Gottfried, Jimmie Walker, Brett Butler, Lois Smith, Happy Anderson, Hannibal Buress, and an appearance by Billy Crystal.

 DeNiro is Jack ‘Jackie’ Burke. A comedic legend best known for his iconic T.V. role decades before who has spent the years since then attempting to reinvent himself as an ‘insult’ comic. Despite rave performances and praise from fans and his fellow comedians, he is still frustrated that he cannot escape from the shadow of his television career and the mistakes he made during those years as a husband, father, and brother. During a performance at a comedy club on the outskirts of New York City he berates a husband and wife in the audience who are filming him for their internet show without his permission and later attacks the husband. At his court hearing, he is offered a plea deal but upon learning that part of the plea involves apologizing to the husband and wife he openly berates them in the courtroom and is sentenced to 30 days in jail plus community service. Once out of jail, Jackie begins his community service serving meals to the homeless while fine tuning his act at a local church. However, since he has not worked and has no money he pays a call upon his estranged brother whom he has not visited in ages to ask for a loan.

Jackie’s brother agrees but only if Jackie will appear at his niece’s wedding. Late one evening at the church he meets Harmony (Mann) whom is also serving community service for assault and battery. Shortly after, Harmony and Jackie make the rounds at some of the New York comedy clubs where Jackie is still ‘welcome’ after which Jackie proposes a trade of sorts, Harmony will be Jackie’s date to his niece’s wedding if Jackie will appear at the dinner to celebrate the birthday of Harmony’s father (Keitel) who is a huge fan of Jackie’s television persona. At the wedding, Jackie performed a variation of his stand-up act to the delight of his niece and her fiancé while simultaneously offending the majority of the other family members. A few days later, Jackie accompanies Harmony to her father’s birthday dinner only to become aggravated when Harmony’s father insists Jackie reenact his T.V. character’s. Jackie responds by sarcastically professing his intentions to sleep with Harmony. Without giving everything away, what follows is a re-awakening of sorts in which Jackie comes to terms with the inevitability that he will always be known for the one role he tries so desperately to get away from and realizes that if he wants to distances himself from it, he’s going to have to embrace the character.

 Despite the all star cast and the fact there were indeed many laughs in the film, it was honestly a waste at the end. This could’ve been an amazing film but it was lacking in its story. The script just didn’t have the ‘heart’ to combine with the premise and the great performances given by the actors. It’s not that they didn’t try, the film just failed to measure up. The acting was great, the directing was good, and there were indeed a few laughs here and there …. it just didn’t have any life to it. Heaven forbid I criticize a DeNiro film, but I can’t give this one more than two out of five stars. I REALLY wanted to like the film, I just didn’t. If it shows up in your digital cable package, go ahead and give it a try. Rent it on iTunes even. Honestly though, I can’t see myself buying the movie.
  
Skyscraper (2018)
Skyscraper (2018)
2018 | Action
As sponsored by Duck Tape.
I have a fundamental problem with this film. And it’s not that it’s an irrevocably cheesy and derivative action movie, since you could automatically assume that by watching the ridiculously over-the-top trailer. But more on that later.

Dwayne Johnson plays Will Sawyer, a security expert left one-legged after a disastrous FBI operation 10 years previously. Now Will has moved with his wife Sarah (Neve Campbell, “Scream”, “House of Cards”) and two young kids into “The Pearl” in Hong Kong, the tallest building – by several Shards – in the world, designed and constructed by tech billionaire Zhao Long Ji (Chin Han, “Independence Day: Resurgence“). As the first residents, the family live in isolated splendour on a high floor. But in true “Die Hard” fashion, baddies, led by a the unconvincingly evil “Scandinavian” Kores Botha (Roland Møller, “The Commuter“), are intent on controlling and then destroying the high-rise. As fire races up towards his family, Will has to use all his physical capabilities to re-enter the building and save his family.

Now, there are implausible leaps in films and then there are IMPLAUSIBLE leaps!
As a story it’s well-crafted but completely bonkers. There are more ludicrous plot holes than muscles on Johnson’s well-crafted body. Why exactly does Botha needs to implement such a ridiculously convoluted plot to secure his goal? Why wasn’t the lift drop delayed by two minutes? Why don’t critical access controls have two-factor authentication? And – most perplexing of all – why don’t the “heaven cameras” show the building below?!!

Big, bigger, biggest!
Both “Die Hard” and “The Towering Inferno”, of which this is an unsubtle blend, could both be similarly accused of lacking credibility but were fun rides. This is not in the same league as either, but has its moments of vertiginous excitement. Johnson is suitably energetic in the muscular lead but lacks acting nuance. I was trying to analyse why this is, and I came down to his eyeballs! In conversation with Campbell, his eyes dart from left to right and back again, as if an army of ants are running over her face. He needs to take lessons on fixed stares from Michael Caine!

Duck tape! Anyone knows if you put two bits together you never get them apart again!
As the title of this review implies, Duck Tape also plays a key role: not for Johnson the fancy blue light/red light gloves of Tom Cruise! It also derives one of the best of a series of quotable lines from the film: “If it can’t be fixed with Duck Tape, you’re not using enough Duck Tape!”.

Neve Campbell is actually the best actor in the film, proving to be suitably kick-ass in her own right. It’s a shame she’s been rather tagged as ‘the screaming girl from “Scream”… no, not Barrymore, the other one’: she deserves more feature film opportunities like this one.

The best acting in the movie from Neve Campbell, here with a Noah Cottrell and a supremely confident performance by McKenna Roberts.
Rawson Marshall Thurber (“Central Intelligence“, “Dodgeball”) keeps the action to a tight 102 minutes, but needs to keep more control over his Hong Kong extras: there is far too much ‘twenty-second-pointing’ and over exuberant jumping up and down going on that draws the attention away from the principals. This is particularly the case in the Die-Hard rip-off of an ending (“HOOOLLLLLLYYYYYY!!!”).

As a popcorn piece of escapist nonsense, it’s serviceable and delivers as a B-grade movie… it’s not good enough to be a “Die Hard” classic, and not bad enough to be a “so bad it’s good” disaster like “Into the Storm“.

Taiwanese actress Hannah Quinlivan as Xia, the ruthless hit-girl.
You’ll note that I haven’t rubbished the film per se. So why then do I hold a negative view of the flick, and indeed somewhat regret going to see it?

One word – – Grenfell.

I knew the plot on going in, but didn’t equate just how damaging the mental effects of that dreadful night of 14th June 2017 were on my soul. Traumatic incendiary scenes together with some insensitive dialogue (“We’re going to turn that tower into a chimney”) broke through the wall of “entertainment” and left just a sick feeling in my stomach. And my wife had exactly the same feelings as we debriefed afterwards. This is a film that might have benefited from sitting on the shelf for a couple of years before release.

If you can separate in your mind the movie story from the shocking reality of one of life’s most unpleasant recent twists, then good for you: go and enjoy the movie. But I wasn’t so lucky so on a purely personal basis this is one occasion when I will give a film two ratings.
  
The Hitman's Bodyguard (2017)
The Hitman's Bodyguard (2017)
2017 | Action, Comedy
A plethora of clichés.
2017’s summer blockbusters fizzle to a halt with this formulaic action comedy. Ryan Reynolds (“Deadpool“) plays Michael Bryce: a cocksure “Triple A rated” bodyguard, always planning three steps ahead so that he can protect his clients without killing anyone in the process. With such arrogance, a fall is inevitable. On the other side of the legal scales is Darius Kincaid (Samuel L Jackson, “The Hateful Eight“), a contract killer who always gets his man. But the incarcerated Kincaid is offered a deal to release his equally incarcerated wife Sonia (Selma Hayek) in return for testifying against the fearsome Belarus president Vladislav Dukhovich (Gary Oldman, “Dawn of the Planet of the Apes”), on trial for war crimes at The Hague. An Interpol team led by Bryce’s’s ex-squeeze Amelia Roussel (the striking Elodie Yung) now have to get Kincaid to Belgium unscathed with Dukhovich’s well-trained and well-armed thugs stopping at nothing to ensure he won’t be there to testify. Fate transpires that Bryce and Kincaid become an unlikely team in trying to bring Dukhovich to justice.


After losing your no claims bonus, hysterical laughter is the only way forwards. Ryan Reynolds and Samuel L Jackson.

This is a movie whose script seems to have been glued together from a patchwork of other movie scenes:


– the bad guy / bad guy partner relationship of “The Nice Guys“. Check.
– the street ambush of “Clear and Present Danger”. Check.
– the Amsterdam boat chase of “Puppet on a Chain”. Check.
– the comedic bar-room brawl from “Airplane”. Check.

Many of the action scenes are done with panache and some great stunt work. But it’s all stuff we’ve seen countless times before, so what is needed for differentiation is the relationships between Bryce and Kincaid: this needs to be the cornerstone of the film. But it just doesn’t quite work. Jackson’s contribution is never in doubt, even though we’ve seen this motherf-ing shtick countless times before: he’s still magnetic, charismatic and a joy to watch. But unfortunately Reynolds just doesn’t deliver the acting goods to make the banter believable: there is a reason “Deadpool” is his best film – he wears a mask for most of it! His ‘puppy-dog look’ gets rolled out multiple times, but it’s unconvincing in the extreme. Together they are no match for Gosling/Crowe in “The Nice Guys“.


Nun but the brave. Jackson (if not Reynolds) get happy clappy.


On firmer ground is the quirky relationship between Mr and Mrs Kincaid. Although sharing limited screen time together, Hayek and Jackson spark off each other wonderfully. Seeing Selma Hayek in uncharacteristically sweary and belligerent mode was highly entertaining (although it’s worth commenting that my wife took great offence to the ‘comic’ bullying of an overweight cellmate).


“I had to ask the guy next to me to pinch me to make sure I wasn’t dreaming” – the future Mr and Mrs Kincaid meet in a rough place… the seediest dive on the wharf.


Elsewhere in the acting roll call, Elodie Yung delivers just the right measure of cuteness, toughness and passion as Roussel, but Oldman delivers a full-on retread of his Ivan “Get off my plane” Korshunov from “Air Force One”. There is also a change to Oldman’s character’s face at the end of the film in the form of a rampant skin complaint which is ‘explained’ by a clumsily inserted news item about an “attempted poisoning”: it’s such a clunky and bizarre addition to the script that it made me wonder whether the actor has some unexpected ailment (like shingles) during filming…. but I can see nothing related to this online.


The striking Elodie Yung as the Interpol agent Roussel.


The screenplay by relative newcomer Tom O’Connor bumps along from implausible action scene to implausible action scene, with more that its fair share of ‘WTF’ moments. For example, after a random chase through multiple Amsterdam alleys and shops, Jackson pulls up outside the very DIY shop Reynolds ends up in to pick him up! The script is also tonally uneven throughout: given this is supposed to be an “action comedy” the action is often brutal and unpleasant and the comedy – in the main – just not funny enough. (About the funniest thing in the film are the most ineffective sub machine guns known to man, most notably in the mildly ludicrous, if well staged, boat chase scene!)


An entertaining cameo from Richard E Grant as a businessman in danger.


The film also manages to offend, in more ways than the 15-rated violence and language used: I’m not sure WHEN this movie was actually filmed, but the use of an articulated lorry as a terrorist weapon towards the end of the film is certainly in very poor taste after the events of Nice, London and Barcelona. Not appreciated.
Directed by Patrick Hughes (“The Expendables 3″…. say no more) this hodge-podge of a flick is sporadically entertaining, but is one I will struggle to remember in a couple of months time.
  
A Monster Calls (2016)
A Monster Calls (2016)
2016 | Drama, Fantasy
“I’ll. Be. Right. Here.”
The worst thing about this movie is its title. The second worst thing about this movie is its trailer. Both will either a) put people off seeing it (it succeeded in that with my wife for example) or b) make people conclude it is a ‘nice holiday film to take the kids to’, which is also an horrendous mistake!
This is a crying shame because it is a riveting drama and a superb piece of film-making by the Spaniard J. A. Bayona (“The Impossible”) that may well catapult it already into my top 10 films of 2017. But it is not, I would suggest, a film that is remotely suitable for kids under 10 to see, dealing as it does with terminal illness, bullying and impending doom. For this is a dark (read pitch black) but hauntingly beautiful film.

Lewis MacDougall, in only his second film (after last year’s “Peter Pan”) plays Conor – a young but talented and sensitive artist growing up as a 12 year old in the North of England with his single mum (Felicity Jones). She is suffering from an aggressive form of cancer and is forever medically grasping for a new hope (D’ya see what I did there?). Young Conor believes fervently that each new treatment will be ‘the one’ but the building tension, the lack of sleep and his recurrent nightmares are destroying him mentally and physically. As if this wasn’t enough, his distracted nature is leading to him being seriously bullied at school and there is the added stress of having to live in his grandmother’s pristine and teen-unfriendly house when his mother is hospitalised.

Towering over the nearby graveyard on the hill is an ancient yew tree and Conor is visited after midnight by this “monster” (voiced by Liam Neeson). Is he dreaming, or is it real? The tree dispatches wisdom in the form of three ‘tales’, with the proviso that Conor tell the tree the fourth tale which “must be the truth”.
A tale of grief, guilt and a search for closure, this is a harrowing but rewarding journey for the viewer.

The film is technically outstanding on so many levels:
the art design is superb, with the gorgeous ‘tale animations’ being highly reminiscent of the beautiful ones in “Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, Part 1”;
the use of sound is brilliant, with sudden silence being used as a weapon with which to assault the senses in one key sequence;
the cinematography by Oscar Faura (“The Imitation Game”) is faultless, capturing both the dreary reality in a Northern winter with the comparative warmth of the strange dream-like sequences;
the music by Fernando Velázquez is used effectively and intelligently to reflect the sombre mood;
the special effects team led by Pau Costa (“The Revenant”, “The Impossible”) shines not just with Neesen’s monster, but with the incorporation of the root and branch effects into the ‘normal’ surroundings.
As the BFG illustrated, having a whole film carried by a young actor is a bit of an ask, but here Lewis MacDougall achieves just that like a seasoned pro. His performance is nothing short of staggering and – although a brave move by the Academy – it would be great to see him nominated for a BAFTA acting award for this.

Confirming her position in the acting top-flight is Felicity Jones, heart-wrenching in her role of the declining mum, and Sigourney Weaver is also excellent as the po-faced but grief-stricken grandmother. Liam Neeson probably didn’t add much by getting dressed up in the mo-cap suit for the tree scenes, but his voice is just perfect as the wise old sage.

The only criticism of what is an absorbing and intelligent script (by Patrick Ness, who also wrote the graphical novel) is the introduction of Conor’s Dad, played by Toby Kebbell (Dr Doom from “The Fantastic 4”), who is literally flown in from LA on a flying visit but whose role is a little superfluous to the plot.
This is exactly what “The BFG” should have been but wasn’t. It draws on a number of potential influences including “Mary Poppins”/”Saving Mr Banks” and “ET”. Wise, clever and a thing of beauty from beginning to end, this is a treat for movie-goers and a highly recommended watch. However, if you have lost someone to “the Big C” be aware that this film could be highly traumatic for you….. or highly cathartic: as I’m not a psychiatrist, I’m really not that sure! Also, if you are of the blubbing kind, take LOTS of tissues: the film features the best use of a digital clock since “Groundhog Day” and if you are not reduced to tears by that scene you are certifiably not human.
  
Death on the Nile (2022)
Death on the Nile (2022)
2022 | Mystery
Most of the female cast. (2 more)
Poirot's backstory.
Kenneth Branagh's mustache.
Slow-moving with little payoff. (2 more)
Nothing substantial happens for the first hour.
Not entertaining. Perfect example of first world problems.
A Drowzy Whodunit Loaded with Mediocrity
Death on the Nile is the sequel to 2017’s Murder on the Orient Express with director and lead actor Kenneth Branagh returning. The mystery thriller is based on the 1937 novel of the same name by Agatha Christie. Death on the Nile has been adapted before as a 1978 film and as a 2004 episode of the Poirot television series starring David Suchet.

The 2022 film has been completed since December of 2019. The film was moved around several times due to COVID and was pushed back even further after Armie Hammer’s abuse allegations.

Mostly occurring shortly after the events of Murder on the Orient Express, Death on the Nile offers a bit of a look into the past of Hercule Poirot (Branagh). Taking place on the Yser Bridge in Belgium In 1914, a young Poirot advises his Belgian captain to attack the Germans spontaneously without warning. The attack is a success, but Poirot’s captain triggers an explosive after their victory. The explosion leaves Poirot’s face heavily scarred and offers an explanation as to why he always has a mustache.

Poirot reunites with his friend Bouc (Tom Bateman, who also returns from Murder on the Orient Express) in Egypt. Bouc is traveling with his mother Euphemia (Annette Bening) and their friends as they celebrate the marriage of Linnet Ridgeway (Gal Gadot) and Simon Doyle (Armie Hammer). To make matters more complicated, Simon was originally romantically involved with Jaqueline (Emma Mackey) who was also a former friend of Linnet. She now scornfully follows Simon and Linnet around Egypt.

The party travels on the S. S. Karnak, a steamship, along the river Nile. A murder eventually takes place on the steamship, which ignites a desire within Poirot to discover who the killer is before more suffer the same fate.

CGI and visual effects are used to make Kenneth Branagh look younger in the opening sequence of the film. The issue is he looks almost as bad as Henry Cavill did as Superman during the reshoots for Justice League. Branagh’s upper lip is almost nonexistent during this sequence and his philtrum seems to barely move when he speaks. It’s a visual nightmare and a terrible way to jump start a murder mystery.

Poirot travels to a Jazz nightclub where he’s first introduced to Simon, Jacqueline, and Linnet. Poirot spends much of the film embracing his OCD habits and people watching. This first nightclub sequence is about ten minutes long and you’re basically forced to watch people do nothing but dance for that entire time. Armie Hammer’s overly sexual dancing combined with his heavy breathing and constant sweating with both Gal Gadot and Emma Mackey is nauseating even without taking his sexual allegations into consideration.

Nothing really happens in the film for the first hour. Death on the Nile takes its time getting to the murder as little things begin to disappear (like a tube of paint) and Simon and Linnet are nearly crushed to death by a falling rock as they’re practically mid-coitus while sightseeing some pyramids. Emma Mackey gives a particularly strong performance. She is blinded by one-sided love in the film and her performance is a combination of passion, borderline insanity, and a broken heart.

Annette Bening is so cynical that it’s humorous and Jennifer Saunders adds just enough sarcastic bite to remind us ever so slightly of Absolutely Fabulous. Letitia Wright portrays business manager Rosalie Otterbourne. Her performance is intriguing because she’s always fighting for what she feels like she’s rightfully owed; whether it’s the right amount of money for her services or her happiness away from the limelight.

Like Murder on the Orient Express and other Agatha Christie adaptations, the enticing aspect of Death on the Nile is not only its massive and recognizable cast but also the fact that the story is written in a way that everyone is a suspect. The film’s nonchalant way of meandering towards that first murder is frustrating. A deliberate pace is one thing, but Death on the Nile is boring for the most part. Poirot is asked to take a case involving Jacqueline and the safety of Simon and Linnet, but is then mocked for being heartless and not being able to solve the case sooner. The people on board are likely meant to be scared, but come off as rich people not getting what they want the instant they want it.

Death on the Nile crawls towards a resolution you don’t feel invested in. Poirot’s backstory is interesting and there are some solid performances especially from the female cast, but the film otherwise feels like an unwanted game of Guess Who after you unwillingly chug two bottles of NyQuil and are asked to predict who the killer is after two long hours of tediousness.
  
Mass Effect: Andromeda
Mass Effect: Andromeda
2017 | Role-Playing
An Example Of Why There Is No Longer A Place For Mediocrity In The Video Game Industry
For those of you that are Mass Effect fans and are worried after reading the title of the essay that I am going to spend the rest of the essay bashing the game, you can rest easy put your pitchfork down. The only reason that Mass Effect is on the receiving end of my criticism today, is because it is simply the most recent example of a major game being released that doesn’t meet the high standard that we have come to expect from videogames in 2017. Don’t get me wrong though, I think that we should expect a high level of production standard in our games and frankly I think the fact that Bioware have released this game in this abysmal state is nothing less than unacceptable.

If you have been generous enough to read any of my other stuff, you may have seen a piece I wrote around a year ago, where I loosely reviewed the Amazing Spiderman 2 on PS4, but really I just used the review as an excuse to talk about the place for mediocrity in the modern gaming landscape. This essay will essentially be an updated version of that piece, because every now and again something comes along and reminds me that mediocrity is still a present factor in modern gaming. I am aware that not every game released can be a 10/10 masterpiece at the level of The Last Of Us, but gaming has came such a long way in the last few decades that in my eyes there is a standard that must be met at this point and there is no room for mediocrity anymore.

As a quick disclaimer, let me say that I love and miss the mid tier section of the video game market. I love so many Codemasters, Midway and THQ games and the mid tier is the main reason that the PS2 is my favourite console. With that out of the way; in theory, mediocrity in gaming should have went away altogether when the mid tier crumbled in the dying days of the PS2. What we should have been left with is incredible AAA experiences and smaller, innovative indie experiences.

Excuses can be made for some examples of recent mediocre games. Liquid Entertainment and Beenox games are mostly movie tie ins, developed quickly and released to make a fast buck off of the back of another property. Hello Games were a small studio that bit off more than they could chew. Sega is a big studio, but they have been slowly going downhill and losing respect at a steady rate for a while now. Bioware aren’t a mid tier developer, they are one of the biggest game developers on the planet. Mass Effect Andromeda had a budget of 40 million dollars and a five year development cycle, that is where most of the shock regarding the state of this game comes from.

Nonetheless, Andromeda will still go on to sell millions of copies, EA will make their money back and more games will be developed in the series. This is because the majority of fans of the previous Mass Effect games will have already pre ordered the newest entry and hype alone with carry this game through any turmoil it faces. Frankly I don’t specifically care about the future of Mass Effect as I have never really been a fan of that series, but if you are a Mass Effect fan this should concern you greatly. If you are unhappy with the state that this game has been released in, don’t buy it and if you really can’t resist playing it at some point, wait a while and buy it used from a Mom and Grop Shop. That way you aren’t giving EA your money and you aren’t allowing them to continue to rely on reaching their profit goals via a lackluster game. That is how you change the future of your favourite franchise; never underestimate the power that you possess as a consumer.

Like I said though, Mass Effect has never been my thing, my concern lies more on the overall gaming market and the worry that this will bleed out and affect the mindset of other developers. Using a big franchise name alone to sell your game and forfeiting any attempt at creating a well made experience for your audience.

This is an issue that we have to stamp out now, it may sound petty or harsh, but this is how we make gaming better for all of us. There is no longer a place in the industry for mediocrity and it is up to us, the consumers to prove that to developers.

The message that I keep reiterating is backed up again by this topic, stop being an apologist, stop settling for less, don’t be afraid to demand a higher standard. Spreading negativity isn’t necessarily a bad thing if it has a legitimate basis. This is how we push mediocrity out of gaming. Playstation’s best slogan is still, ‘Expect Greatness,’ because we should expect greatness from developers; don’t be afraid to call a spade a spade. The most powerful voice of all lives in your back pocket; your hard earned cash and that is what gives you the right to call for better experiences.
  
Eliza and Her Monsters
Eliza and Her Monsters
Francesca Zappia | 2017 | Romance, Young Adult (YA)
I always read before I go to bed, so last night I decided to pick up Eliza and Her Monsters by Francesca Zappia. I fell in love and before I knew it, I was 50% done but I thought I could read for another 15 or so minutes – that turned into me finishing the book at midnight. I don’t regret a thing. This is a mental health book that deals with trauma, anxiety, and depression, so I would just like to give all readers a trigger warning. I personally felt that it was beautifully written, but not everyone will feel the same way so I suggest a level of caution if you think you may be triggered by these things. I wouldn’t want anyone to feel harmed by this book or any book.

Just a warning, I do talk about the relationships in this book as well as some plot points. I don’t discuss anything that wasn’t mentioned in the synopsis on the book or Goodreads, but if you haven’t read those then this is your spoiler warning.

Our main character is Eliza, the anonymous creator of the famous webcomic Monsterous Seas. She has always been more comfortable online than dealing with the real world, or real people. All of her friends are online. She has always kept her identity a secret and as the popularity of her work has grown, the fervor to learn her identity has as well.

Eliza has always been content to spend her days in school drawing and talking to no one – that is until there is a new guy in school, Wallace. Against all odds, he is a fan of Monsterous Seas and actually writes fan fiction about it. It doesn’t take long before they become friends and Wallace gets Eliza to come a little more out of her shell. Their friendship was so precious and I loved watching them bond over a story that was so important to each of their lives.

The romance aspect of the book also made me super happy – I legitimately was smiling every time they were super cute together. Even though they each had their issues to deal with, they didn’t push each other past their respective lines of security. They were supportive of one another and I think that Wallace was the perfect foil for Eliza. Yes, they had their troubles but at the end of the day, they were there for one another.

The family dynamic was completely relatable if frustrating at times. Eliza’s parents don’t truly understand what her webcomic is or how famous it is, which causes a lot of friction within the family. Her parents want to understand her more, but Eliza is very closed and protective of herself. While they may not understand the importance of it even if she took the time to explain it and what it means to the world, she doesn’t even give them the chance. Eliza is defensive and her lack of communication is what ultimately leads to the worst crisis she experiences, despite her parent's well-meaning intentions.

The most heart-warming part of the novel was the scene in which one of her brothers stood up for her and supported Eliza. It was such a precious moment and it was nice to see a positive familial connection being formed. Eliza learns throughout the novel that she never gave her family a chance and that maybe she doesn’t really know them. The growth that she experiences over the course of the novel was wonderful to see and gives you hope that (although she’s fictional) perhaps things will change for the better with her family and her life.

As a person who feels infinitely more comfortable talking to someone over the internet than in person, there were many times that I related to Eliza. I completely understand the anxiety of talking to another person, even one-on-one. I cannot imagine the stress and havoc the reveal of your identity to millions of people would have on your psyche and body. My heart broke when we found out her identity was exposed because Francesca wrote a character so real that we could feel her horror and destruction.

There was also some diversity in this book, although it wasn’t as explored as it could have been. Wallace’s family is a unique situation and I would have loved to learn more about them, but understand that it would have slowed down the pacing of the novel. I can’t say more because I don’t want this to have actual spoilers, so just go read the book. While it is not explicitly mentioned in the book, the author wrote in a tweet that she wished her portrayal of ace/demi sexuality was truly addressed. I think that would have brought a wonderful level of diversity that we don’t normally see in books and could use more of.

If it wasn’t clear from my ‘I read it in one sitting into the wee hours of the night’ tale, I absolutely loved this book. It was very relatable and as an introverted fangirl myself, I personally felt represented by this book. Even though I didn’t know about it before it was published, I definitely expect it to make my best of 2017 list. It is a contemporary that, in my opinion, honestly and respectfully tackles mental illness, family relationships and is so wonderfully written that I hope you fall in love with it as well.
  
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Debbiereadsbook (1110 KP) rated From A Jack To A King in Books

Jul 3, 2018 (Updated Jan 31, 2019)  
From A Jack To A King
From A Jack To A King
Scotty Cade | 2018 | LGBTQ+, Romance
10
10.0 (1 Ratings)
Book Rating
bloody LOVED this book! and the narration!
Independent reviewer for Divine Magazine, I was gifted both the ebook AND audio version of this book.

First half of this review is from when I READ it, the second half is the audio bit.

Oh it's been a while since I had my Scotty Cade fix, and this proper hit THAT spot!

Bay is, by his own words, pretty much a recluse. Save for promoting his latest book and getting his gambling hit, he doesn't get out much. And when he DOES, he uses his character Jack as his alter ego. Winning escort King in a card game, and coming face to face with the spitting image of Jack knocks Bay off his axis. Just as meeting Bay knocks King off of his. King doesn't see Jack, he sees BAY. He also sees that Bay might be the one to halt his recovery.

I will be honest here, cos ya'll know I'm all about sharing, and tell you, I walked into this one a little wary. I've read a couple of other porn star books and had pretty much decided that I didn't like that particular troupe, and I wouldn't read any more. But this came up, and, I mean, its' Scotty Cade for heaven's sake! So I signed up and I was so very NOT disappointed!

What this one did, what made it stand out, was there was very little "work" time for King, once he and Bay had met. There is a scene before, and one after. But the one after is a huge part of the story; a necessary and integral part.

I loved that it's nearly to the end of the book before Bay and King come together properly. Loved that Bay put his research skills to good use; both for helping King with his recovery and watching all those videos to further his relationship with King.

Loved that while previously only ever having been with women, Bay didn't seem overly perturbed by his attraction to King. OH, he questioned his sexuality, many many times, but he wasn't particularly bothered by it!

There are some difficult topics dealt with here. Bullying and how that effects Bay as an adult. Sex addiction and how that makes King so very wary of what he feels for Bay so very VERY early on. Both topics are dealt with well and with sensitivity, but some readers may struggle with them.

I have just one teeny tiny niggle, but it doesn't affect my rating or my overall enjoyment of this book. It's just ME, being a little bit picky!

I would have liked, just once, while Bay and King are up close and personal, for Bay to have used King's given name, and not his "stage" name. That's all! Told you it was me being picky!

Mr Cade has a particular knack of writing with emotion; of being able to make you cry in really random places along with his characters; of being able to grab at your heart strings, tug them, snap them and put them back together again! And I bloody loved this book for that!!

I read this in one sitting, stayed up way past my bedtime to finish this! Loved it!!

5 full and shiny stars!

AUDIO REVIEW

Kenneth Obi narrates. And Mr Obi is growing on me for several reasons. As I see more and more books narrated by him, I can see his skill set growing. A quick search shows far more books that I expected, but the oldest is only November 2017, so he is still fairly new at this, and in the time since I listened to the other one he narrated that is in my library, I can hear a difference.

Obi's voice for Bay was. . . unexpected. I've no idea WHY, but that was my first thought. He sounds almost too young, but as I listened, I realised it fit Bay, PERFECTLY, it really did. I LOVED Bay's voice, I really did.

Obi's reading voice is clear and even, his voices for ALL the characters are clear and distinct enough for my crappy hearing to make them out. It was my only real criticism in the last book I listened to of his work, the voices were too similar for my crappy hearing to keep up. NOT so here.

The scenes for King and Bay getting up close and personal came over way more. . .what's the word. . . whats. . . .the. . .word. . . intense? maybe? I dunno, can't find that right word, and I hate not being able to do that, but they came across all kinds of different to when I read it. An AMAZING different though, cos Obi got out all the emotions that you don't always pick up when reading. The hitches and dips in the voices, the little noises, they don't always come across well on paper but HEARING them?? Oh yes Sir, intense is the right word!

I stand by what I said in my read review though! I would have liked, just once, while Bay and King are up close and personal, for Bay to have used King's given name, and not his "stage" name. That's all!

Watch out for Mr Obi, he's now firmly on my list!!

5 stars for the book
5 stars for the narration
5 stars overall.

**same worded review will appear elsewhere**
  
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Gareth von Kallenbach (971 KP) rated the PC version of Call of Duty WWII in Video Games

Jun 19, 2019  
Call of Duty WWII
Call of Duty WWII
2017 | Shooter
The long running and very popular Call of Duty series has gone back to where it all began for the latest entry into the series. Call of Duty: WW2 returns the series to where the early games in the series were set and looks to restore its legacy as the best-selling series on the planet in doing so.

Last year’s Call of Duty: Infinite Warfare did not sell as well as other in the series had in recent years, and many fans were upset or divided over a futuristic setting that involved spaceships, energy weapons, and futuristic locations and technology.

It should be noted that the series has three developers working on games so developer Sledgehammer likely started work on the game before Call of Duty: Black Ops 3, and Call of Duty: Infinite Warfare shipped so the return to WW2 was something long in the planning.

The game opens with D-Day and players play as a young Private who is thrown headfirst into the conflict and learns the horrors of war as well as duty, honor, and sacrifice through his missions and interactions with members of his platoon.

Over the course of the missions, players will battle in highly-detailed maps and locales ranging from forests, bunkers, beaches, and bombed out cities as the Allies advance deeper and deeper into enemy held locales. The various locales for the game are so highly-detailed that they seem right out of a movie and would be a dream come true for location scouts looking for filming locations.

As anyone who has played a call of Duty game knows, they will be faced with waves of enemies to fight off as well as the usual stealth and vehicle missions. This time out there are a couple of driving missions as well as a clever one in a tank and one airborne fighter escort.

The attention to detail is very good as enemy Panzer tanks can take any fire from your tank head on, but have weaker armor in the bank which leads players to have to flank the enemy to survive.

Another new wrinkle is the health system which does not regenerate in the story mode and instead requires players to take cover and use a first aid kit in order to heal. The multiplayer portion does use a regenerative system so players can avoid any major disruptions in battle.

I really liked Josh Duhamel as the rough Sargent with a backstory. He was a very interesting character that kept me guessing as to his motivations and next moves as the story advanced.

Players could also call in ammo, mortar strikes, and health by requesting them from select members of their platoon. This could be tricky as when pinned down, having to move to another character to get needed items added to the challenge.

The weaponry was appropriate for the time and I had to adjust to slower load times, accuracy issues, and such with older tech, but it did give me a much greater level of immersion.

While I did enjoy the solo campaign, it did at times seem very familiar and as if I had seen and played some of it all before. I guess that is the trick with a series that has run as long as Call of Duty has as certain aspects of the gameplay are expected and while locations, weapons, locations, and characters may change, some things are going to be constant throughout the series.

The multiplayer aspects of the game really shine as not only are there numerous multiplayer modes, players can now pick a class such as Airborne, Recon, etc. which each have their own weapons and abilities and allow players to pick a division that best matches their abilities and gameplay style.

This comes in very handy in the new War mode where teams much battle one another to accomplish various objectives. Such as escorting tanks, protecting or stealing gas, and taking or defending key locales. My only issue is that this mode and many maps are camp fests where people with scoped rifles can easily hide in the back part of a map and pick off players as they spawn or enter the map. It seems far more pronounced in this game and leads to some frustrations. There is also the matter of iffy hit detection where players take half a clip from a machine gun point blank and yet can absorb them and one shit kill a player all while you unload on them.

 

There is also a very good Zombie mode where players take on wave after wave of undead soldiers as they attempt to get power restored and activate technology. The speed of the game is intense, the enemies numerous, and the ability to arm, armor up, and accessories your character is key as is having a good team around you.

As one person said that is Call of Duty and you know what you are in for if you have played any of the prior games. As such Call of Duty: World War 2 is not a radical new direction for the series, but rather a return to what made the series and is like slipping into a comfy pair of slippers after a long day., Familiar and comfortable and is in my opinion what the series needed.

http://sknr.net/2017/11/06/call-duty-ww2/
  
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Gareth von Kallenbach (971 KP) rated the PlayStation 4 version of Bulletstorm: Full Clip Edition in Video Games

Jun 19, 2019  
Bulletstorm: Full Clip Edition
Bulletstorm: Full Clip Edition
2017 | Shooter
When it was first released in 2011; Bulletstorm earned solid reviews and became a cult hit in large part to the over the top action and winning mix of characters, settings, and humor. Sadly though the game never did sell that well which made it a commercial failure and pretty much ended any hopes for a sequel.

Thankfully the developer People Can Fly has teamed with Gearbox to bring us Bulletstorm: Full Clip Edition which returns the game with upgraded graphics and framerates to let it take advantage of the new generation of gaming platforms, as well as the ability to play the campaign and online content as Duke Nukem.

 Bulletstorm: Full Clip Edition combines action, humor, and enjoyable gameplay to create a winning product. The game was tells the story of privateer Grayson Hunt who has spent the last ten years of his life on a mission of revenge against a corrupt general who has wronged him and his crew. When the opportunity for revenge arises, Grayson crashes his own ship in order to bring the generals ship down which strands them on the hostile world of Stygia. Stygia used to be a resort world and now scores of mutants, monsters, dangerous plants, and more roam the landscape making short work of all they encounter.

With his friend Sato in need of medical care following the crash, Grayson and Sato set out to find the general in order to get off the planet and to get Sato proper medical care less his cyborg implants take over his body. Along the way Grayson and Sato must face many challenges and battle against never ending hordes of bad guys. Thankfully they have some awesome firepower at their disposal ranging from shotguns to assault rifles as well as sniper rifles and rocket launchers. The game requires players to purchase new weapons and ammo as well as the ability to upgrade your weapons from dropships which are scattered throughout the landscape.

The more bad guys you dispatch and the more creative you are with your kills earns you more points to spend on your arsenal. One of my favorite weapons is the sniper rifle which allows you to steer your fired shot into your enemies, which comes in handy considering how much cover they like to take. Should you run out of ammo, you can always send a bad guy flying, thanks to a kick from Grayson who has no issue with kicking hordes of bad guys into various obstacles. The game awards you for being creative with your kills like kicking someone to impale them on an object which gets you a Voodoo Doll reward as does sending an enemy into an electrical field or sending them into the jaws of a deadly plant.

There are so many ways to take out enemies half the fun is finding out new ways to do so. I also liked being able to supercharge my weapon and vaporize any underlings that got in my way. The game also allows players a leash which fires an electrical tether to manipulate objects. I love latching onto enemies and pulling them into harms way, or towards me so I could kick them into harms way, or unleash a fury of bullets upon them.

The graphics of the game are solid as the Unreal engine has taken what was a great looking game and made it look even better and has brought it up to modern standards even in areas where the graphics may seem a bit dated. From scenic landscapes to epic monsters the game deftly handles them all. An early chase from a gigantic mining wheel is still awesome as it encompasses the depth of the landscape and surroundings of Stygia. The language in the game is very sharp. Characters will unleash salvos of profanity that would make a drill sergeant cringe, but they are often done in very funny and unique combinations.

The multiplay modes of the game shine as well. You can really enjoy teaming up for unique kills. The control system of the game is good as I was easily able to move between movement and fire modes without any issues which allowed me to concentrate on the game and its challenges rather than having to fight a control system. Bulletstorm is also very clever with the locations of the game as one minute I am flying in an airship taking on a gigantic creature whereas another time I was guiding a giant robotic dinosaur through an amusement park to dispatch the bad guys. I also enjoy playing the Echoes mode which requires players to complete various locales and creatively dispatching enemies to earn points which will unlock new levels.

Being able to play as Duke Nukem in both the campaign and online was fun as it allowed me to experience the game from a new perspective and it is always great to see Duke in action.

From the winning mix of action and humor to the numerous variations the gameplay offers Bulletstorm is a winner from top to bottom. Some may find the solo play campaign a bit short and may say that some of the boss battles were overly tricky. I prefer to see the game as a great action romp which is set up perfectly for a sequel and is still one of the best action shooters in recent history.

http://sknr.net/2017/04/10/bulletstorm-full-cliip-edition/