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Fast & Furious Presents: Hobbs & Shaw (2019)
Fast & Furious Presents: Hobbs & Shaw (2019)
2019 | Action, Adventure
Before you read this review of Fast & Furious Presents: Hobbs & Shaw, I just want you to know that I can’t stand this franchise. I gave up keeping up with them after Furious 7 and felt like the Fast & Furious franchise peaked/was tolerable around Fast Five and never really went anywhere worthwhile before or since. I have not seen all the films and really only seemed to watch every other entry, but whether you’re in a heist or a drag race that lethal dose of masculinity being projectile vomited all over you by an entire cast (women included) for two hours straight is dull and tiresome. In fact, just call this franchise “Dull & Tiresome” from here on out and I doubt anyone would notice. It’s even got “tire” in there for car…stuff.

Ignoring the fact that screenwriters Chris Morgan (writer of every Fast and Furious entry since Tokyo Drift) and Drew Pearce (writer and director of the flop known as Hotel Artemis) were involved, I actually like David Leitch’s work (co-director of John Wick, director of Deadpool 2 and Atomic Blonde) even if he is probably going to screw up that Enter the Dragon remake. The trailers also made Hobbs & Shaw look like the stupid kind of action film I might enjoy; a bunch of fight scenes and chase sequences that give the middle finger to physics. But when a big moment in the film is a group of the good guys willingly bringing a bunch of sharp sticks to a battle where the villains are loaded to the teeth with highly advanced firearms, then you know you’ve jumped headfirst into the deep end of ridiculous without a special needs helmet.

The film is quick to point out that even though Luke Hobbs (Dwayne Johnson) is in Los Angeles and Deckard Shaw (Jason Statham) is in London, they’re essentially similar characters. Hobbs is a big dude who likes to Hulk smash everything while Shaw likes to think he has more class and finesse to his ass beatings and exaggerated torture devices. Despite their different cultures and supposedly unique way of approaching their work, they do nothing but talk trash, jack things up, simultaneously kick unsuspecting guys in the balls, and track stuff that needs tracking because that’s what trackers do. They reluctantly join forces and are in constant competition with one another to find some CT17 virus, which is currently inside Shaw’s MI6 operative sister Hattie Shaw (Vanessa Kirby) and is being hunted by formerly dead, cyber genetically altered, and current superhuman criminal mastermind Brixton Lore (Idris Elba). Don’t get too attached to the whole virus thing since even the film can’t keep up with what the hell it’s supposed to be.

The highlight of Hobbs & Shaw is the amount of cameos it’s able to squeeze into its excruciating two-hour-and-fifteen-minute runtime. The film utilizes about a third of the cast of a certain sequel to a certain film starring a certain Regenerating Degenerate and that cast is responsible for the humor that works best in whatever this spinoff is supposed to accomplish. Idris Elba is unbelievably cool as Brixton Lore. He’s this cocky and unstoppable bad ass who has a history with Shaw and his car chase on his self-driving motorcycle where he slides under a bus in slow motion is too sick for words. Vanessa Kirby has this on-screen presence that outshines the consistent bickering between Hobbs and Shaw. She’s the one capable female character in the film (Helen Mirren sitting behind glass doesn’t count) who seems to be the only one thinking logically, but it took her doing the dumbest thing imaginable at the beginning of the film to get that way.

This action film smorgasbord rides on the chemistry between Dwayne Johnson and Jason Statham, but that gets old as soon as they start sort-of working together. Their incessant ribbing of each other, desire to always outdo one another, and nonstop unfiltered machismo being this palpable elephant in the room leads to nothing but verbal dick size comparisons and leaves you thinking that maybe they’ll make out or grope each other by the end of the film. Spoiler alert: maybe they’re saving that for the sequel.

There isn’t enough of a differentiation between action sequences in Hobbs & Shaw to make it feel worthwhile. There’s chemistry between the cast that is undeniable and some of its outrageousness is entertaining, but it all begins to feel similar and falls apart far sooner than it should. For those who care, there is a mid-credits and after-credits scene but neither is surprising. The cheesy motivational speeches, forced heartfelt stories, and, “all technology in the world doesn’t beat heart,” mumbo jumbo doesn’t help matters. The supposed story for this film is basically a dunce cap disguised as a pocket protector. There are intelligent elements used in ludicrous ways and maybe that’s what could describe the Fast & Furious franchise as a whole. You can bury a diamond in a dog turd and say it’s extravagant and that it’s valuable, but it’s still a dog turd that smells awful and lingers long after it’s been flushed away.
  
End of Watch (2012)
End of Watch (2012)
2012 | Drama
8
8.7 (13 Ratings)
Movie Rating
Director/Writer David Ayer (Street Kings, Training day) once again takes us into the world of the Los Angeles police department in the new movie End of Watch. Only this time rather than go in the corrupt police officer direction he has gone before, Ayer instead takes audiences on a honest and somewhat realistic emotionally charged ride along with two young and confident LAPD patrolmen.

While the story in this film is as simple as two cops over reaching their pay grades causing them to get on a drug cartels hit list. The film is more like an unrated extended episode of the TV series Cops, focusing on the everyday encounters of our heroes as they patrol south central LA. These encounters range from calls for lost children, domestic disturbance, and noise violations, albeit a bit exaggerated in these and several other incidents. Still the various types of encounters cause the film to feel like a true ride along into the lives of these LAPD cops. Additionally the use of the handheld “found footage” film style works surprisingly well at giving the movie that TV episodic style that makes the overall experience feel realistic. That being said, there are a few scenes where it is not clear who is holding the camera or where the shot is coming from, however these scenes are barely noticeable because of the excellent performances by our protagonists that keeps our interest on what they are saying and doing on screen rather than who is holding the camera.

Officer Bryan Taylor (Jake Gyllenhaal, Source Code) is our main protagonist of this movie. The ex-marine turned cop has to take an art elective in his pre-law studies and decides to take a documentary film class and take us on the inside of the LAPD. Gyllenhaal ‘s performance embodies Taylor as the good natured ambitious officer wanting more in his life of relationships and career. It would be easy for this character to be the traditional good cop in movies like this however given the found footage film style we instead find that Taylor, while good, can also be a complete “jerk” cop who is quick to anger and use brutish force when he deems necessary. This only helps solidify the rawness and reality of this film which pays a nod to the difficult nature of this job for real life police officers. Gyllenhaal gives yet another outstanding performance in his career causing us to grow attached to his character and respect him.

In addition Michel Pena (Crash) delivers a fantastic performance as Taylor’s partner and best friend Officer Mike Zavala. Pena embodies the other side to Gyllenhaal’s “jerk” cop by with his own good natured, simple man who is quick to become a bull when pushed. No more is this better shown in a scene where Zavala and a gang member get into a war of words and caused Zavala to drop his gun and badge and fight man to man to settle their dispute in the “street” way. Thus earning respect from that particular gang member.

Together Gyllenhaal and Pena share the screen wonderfully. Their relationship seems effortless and natural as if they were actually partners and best friends. You can tell they are having fun on set working together and it shows in their performance together as they really get a sense that they are more than partners and friends but are in fact, brothers. Their relationship and characters are only developed further as we watch Taylor pursue a deeper intellectual relationship with scientist Janet (Anna Kendrick, Up In The Air) and Zavala through the birth of his first born from wife Gabby (Natalie Martinez, Death Race). Kendrick and Martinez give believable performances as love interests to our heroes that show us a more human and softer side of these testosterone filled officers who will do whatever it takes to uphold the law. Throw in a strong supporting cast of other police officers led by Frank Grillo (Warrior) who plays the LAPD’s sergeant and you have a performance where we not only care about our heroes but we see the brotherhood of the police force in general.

One thing that I was not expecting from the film is the amount of moments where the audience literally laughed out loud. That is not to say that this is a comedy, in fact it is far from it. But the quick witted jokes and verbal jabs by our onscreen partners help alleviate some of the heavy emotional scenes of the movie. I felt that these characters used that good natured humor to keep themselves from going off of the deep end in handling all of the gruesome encounters they witness. These well placed laughs helped the audience deal with these gruesome scenes as well and helped strengthen our bond with these brothers.

All in all, this movie is a buddy cop film on steroids. While there is not much of a traditional story arch, this helps develop the realistic feel more like an unrated extended episode of Cops. That being said Gyllenhaal and Pena deliver a fantastic performance together. They have a real connection that makes you believe they have been partners for years and consider each other brothers. Add in a solid ensemble cast and the overall experience is worth the price of admission. However those who grow motion sick from found footage films may want to stay clear as there is a definite lack of steady cam
  
The Dark Descent of Elizabeth Frankenstein
The Dark Descent of Elizabeth Frankenstein
Kiersten White | 2018 | Thriller, Young Adult (YA)
8
7.8 (4 Ratings)
Book Rating
Great characters (0 more)
Inconsistency in some parts (0 more)
Contains spoilers, click to show
The most amazing thing about classic horror stories is how they still influence many writers today.

To read 'the Dark Descent of Elizabeth Frankenstein,' you don't have to know anything about Mary Shelley's original creation. No, this book seems to take the story of Dr. Frankenstein in a completely different direction than what was known 200 years ago. I, personally, haven't read Shelley's book, but after reading this one, I certainly want to now. Victor Frankenstein is the most interesting character I have read about in a long time.

'The Dark Descent of Elizabeth Frankenstein' takes us to Victor's childhood, where we observe him becoming the insane doctor that he was in 'Frankenstein' - but this one doesn't pass Victor's 21st birthday, and his creation of a 'creature' is much earlier than in Shelley's version. This book was still very enjoyable,even if it doesn't line up with the classic. But instead of following Victor's descent into darkness, we follow Elizabeth's ascension from darkness through her need to be taken care of for the remainder of her life - 'And if Victor did not seem to respond to my sweetness,I would simply cry. He never could stand it when I cried. It would hurt him. I smiled in anticipation, letting the meanness at my core stretch like ill-used muscles' Another interesting part of this book is seeing how well the author, White, creates a sociopathic lead female character, who has tailored herself to wearing the right faces and acting a certain way to get what she wants.

We enter the book with Elizabeth and her good friend, Justine, on a trip to find Victor, who has stopped writing from school some months before - Victor's mother had died before he left, and now Elizabeth was questioning whether or not his father was going to keep her around. We get flash backs here and there of Elizabeth and Victor as children together. The reader is shown that Elizabeth is the only person who can calm Victor during his 'rages,' and she seems to be the only person he allowed inside his world. We're led to believe that Elizabeth truly cares for Victor,but quickly we are told that she only cares if she has a roof over her head or not. Eventually, Elizabeth finds Victor, but he is in the midst of a fever - an ailment he falls under quite often whenever his studies would keep him from eating, drinking and sleeping - he whispers in a fever state 'Do not tell Elizabeth.' and 'It worked.' The horror quickly takes place when Elizabeth explores his surroundings to find a makeshift lab with body parts,both human and animal.

The book spends a lot of time with Elizabeth waiting on Victor, usually for him to return home to the Frankenstein estate. Although White does an amazing job of bringing back words and writing that was of 200 years ago, sometimes it seems she's too busy concentrating on that rather than paying attention to consistency. The story had me glued to the book from part one, but what really kept me going was the character, Victor. If this entire story had been from his point of view, I would have put this book at the top of my favorite books list. This also should have been titled 'the Dark Descent of Victor Frankenstein,' because it's Victor who seems to slowly descend into madness, not Elizabeth, she seems to know what he is going to become, but because she is so occupied with keeping her place at the Frankenstein household, she does nothing to stop it.

Victor, by today's standards, is a murderer in the making:

"The deer stopped keening. It did not die as Victor tugged the knife through the skin over its stomach. I had imagined it parting like the crust of a loaf of bread,but it was tough, resistant. The sound of tearing made me sick. I turned away as Victor strained to make progress with blood coating his hands and making the knife slippery."

Elizabeth takes great measures to keep Victor out of trouble,even when he nearly severs the arm of his little brother out of curiosity. She focuses on keeping the little brother alive, then placing blame on the nursemaid by planting a pair of scissors from her sewing supplies. Elizabeth was not only a good liar, but she was also an antagonist. When Victor seems to not be able to cope with what he did to his little brother, she quickly tells him what they will say to his father: " ' We know what happened. It was the nursemaid's fault for leaving out her sewing supplies. She is stupid and lazy and still sleeping. She will be punished and relieved of her duties. Ernest will be fine.' I paused to be sure Victor understood that this was our story,no matter what. 'And we are fortunate that she is stupid and lazy and convenient, and nothing like this will happen again. Will it?' " She may have very well been the reason Victor did the things he did.

Victor, of course, ends up making a monster, but White didn't try to retell the Shelley novel, instead she tried to give it a different spin from a different perspective. As a storyteller, White did an impressive job with wording and flashbacks. For die-hard fans of Shelley's 'Frankenstein,' I wouldn't recommend ' the Dark Decent of Elizabeth Frankenstein' unless you are willing to read it with an open mind. I only wish there had been more scenes with Victor - an unforgettable character.
  
Nightmares: A New Decade of Modern Horror
Nightmares: A New Decade of Modern Horror
Ellen Datlow | 2016 | Horror
8
7.0 (2 Ratings)
Book Rating
Shallaballah by [a:Mark Samuels|679023|Mark Samuels|https://images.gr-assets.com/authors/1485638875p2/679023.jpg]
Weird and I didn't completely understand it. I'm not big on surreal-like stories.
1.5 stars

Sob in the Silence by [a:Gene Wolfe|23069|Gene Wolfe|https://images.gr-assets.com/authors/1207670073p2/23069.jpg]
I liked it okay, but wasn't wowed. I feel like there was a missed opportunity and that the ending was too abrupt.
3 stars

Our Tun Too Will One Day Come by [a:Brian Hodge|167606|Brian Hodge|https://images.gr-assets.com/authors/1326937946p2/167606.jpg]
Folklore and horror equal an interesting tale. I'd read more from Brian Hodge.
4 stars

Dead Sea Fruit by [a:Kaaron Warren|1207458|Kaaron Warren|https://images.gr-assets.com/authors/1303270263p2/1207458.jpg]
So far the best in the book. Perfectly paced and pretty darned creepy.
4.5 stars

Closet Dreams by [a:Lisa Tuttle|38313|Lisa Tuttle|https://images.gr-assets.com/authors/1296860221p2/38313.jpg]
Haunting. That's the first word that popped into my head when I finished this story. Also, disturbing, sad, and devastating. Trigger warning: <spoiler>pedophilia and abduction, although not described in any kind of detail</spoiler>
5 stars

Spectral Evidence by [a:Gemma Files|765702|Gemma Files|https://images.gr-assets.com/authors/1266869494p2/765702.jpg]
I had a hard time with this, especially at the beginning since it's written as a case study with footnotes. Had this been written as a regular short story, I do believe the horror is there for a good tale, but as it stands it didn't feel at all scary or nightmarish.
2.5 stars

Hushabye by [a:Simon Bestwick|2830642|Simon Bestwick|https://s.gr-assets.com/assets/nophoto/user/u_50x66-632230dc9882b4352d753eedf9396530.png]
This was...okay. It sorta fit the book, but it also sorta didn't. The story almost felt noir, but not quite, plus everything was rather vague. Not bad, but fine.
3 stars

Very Low-Flying Aircraft by [a:Nicholas Royle|20435|Nicholas Royle|https://s.gr-assets.com/assets/nophoto/user/m_50x66-82093808bca726cb3249a493fbd3bd0f.png]
The only horror in this is the fact that it's included in a horror anthology. I'm not even sure what the point was.
1.5 stars

The Goosle by [a:Margo Lanagan|277536|Margo Lanagan|https://images.gr-assets.com/authors/1361153347p2/277536.jpg]
Meh. An even more twisted sequel of sorts to Hansel and Gretel sans Gretel. While it's gory, it didn't bother me but I didn't love it.
3 stars

The Clay Party by [a:Steve Duffy|376166|Steve Duffy|https://images.gr-assets.com/authors/1329037438p2/376166.jpg]
A take on the Donner Party told through diary entries and a letter at the end.
4 stars

Strappado by [a:Laird Barron|466494|Laird Barron|https://images.gr-assets.com/authors/1446325324p2/466494.jpg]
This didn't do anything for me; it was just too vague.
2 stars

Lonegan's Luck by [a:Stephen Graham Jones|96300|Stephen Graham Jones|https://images.gr-assets.com/authors/1458951688p2/96300.jpg]
Interesting, the writing and pace was good. The MC is a conman of the old(?) West. I didn't understand why he did what he did exactly, like were there circumstances of something that happened to the country as a whole, but it's not such a big thing. I only hoped he'd get a taste of his own medicine, so to speak.
3 stars

Mr. Pigsny by [a:Reggie Oliver|518983|Reggie Oliver|https://images.gr-assets.com/authors/1477924368p2/518983.jpg]
An odd, creepy little tale.
4 stars

At Night, When the Demons Come by [a:Ray Cluley|4446653|Ray Cluley|https://s.gr-assets.com/assets/nophoto/user/u_50x66-632230dc9882b4352d753eedf9396530.png]
Perfectly told, perfectly paced, with a horrible-ish ending. Definitely memorable.
4.5 stars

Was She Wicked? Was She Good by [a:Mary Rickert|7344680|Mary Rickert|https://s.gr-assets.com/assets/nophoto/user/u_50x66-632230dc9882b4352d753eedf9396530.png] (as M. Rickert)
Meh. Not bad, but not great either. I don't really have much to say about it.
3 stars

The Shallows by [a:John Langan|58413|John Langan|https://s.gr-assets.com/assets/nophoto/user/u_50x66-632230dc9882b4352d753eedf9396530.png]
I honestly don't even remember this one so it must not have been all that bad or good.
2 stars

Little Pig by [a:Anna Taborska|4343515|Anna Taborska|https://s.gr-assets.com/assets/nophoto/user/u_50x66-632230dc9882b4352d753eedf9396530.png]
Horrific only in the way of what you might do to for the survival of those you love. A quirky start with an powerful ending.
4 stars

Omphalos by [a:Livia Llewellyn|2966042|Livia Llewellyn|https://images.gr-assets.com/authors/1298571003p2/2966042.jpg]
Well-written but definitely not one for everybody. It's sick, a little too descriptive with the incest. I don't need an actual scene with explicitness. While I felt sorry for the MC and her brother, the story made me sad for actual victims. Possibly the point, but it's an upsetting story that some should probably skip. Also, what happened in the end? I get some of it, but it was so confusing and vague that I didn't fully comprehend the conclusion. It doesn't matter much, but I'm getting tired of vague endings or other scenes in these stories.
3.5 stars

How We Escaped Our Certain Fate by [a:Dan Chaon|16560|Dan Chaon|https://images.gr-assets.com/authors/1241719844p2/16560.jpg]
Interesting and thoughtful zombie tale. Slightly melancholy.
3.5 stars

That Tiny Flutter of The Heart I Used to Call Love by [a:Robert Shearman|128037|Robert Shearman|https://images.gr-assets.com/authors/1363523036p2/128037.jpg]
Strange. I'm not sure exactly what I thought of this tale, and I'm not sure I totally get what happened at the end, but that seems to be my lot with some of these stories.
3 stars

Interstate Love Song (Murder Ballad No. 8) by [a:Caitlín R. Kiernan|4798562|Caitlín R. Kiernan|https://images.gr-assets.com/authors/1491390729p2/4798562.jpg]
I liked this story. It was....interesting to say the least. Not my favorite but solid.
3.75 stars

Shay Corsham Worsted by [a:Garth Nix|8347|Garth Nix|https://images.gr-assets.com/authors/1207583754p2/8347.jpg]
3.5 stars

The Atlas of Hell by [a:Nathan Ballingrud|2957979|Nathan Ballingrud|https://images.gr-assets.com/authors/1354770124p2/2957979.jpg]
4.5 stars

Ambitious Boys Like You by [a:Richard Kadrey|37557|Richard Kadrey|https://images.gr-assets.com/authors/1252945001p2/37557.jpg]
4 - 4.5 stars

 Okay, I kinda ran out of reviewing steam near the end, but the last two stories were excellent.
  
A Clockwork Orange (1971)
A Clockwork Orange (1971)
1971 | Crime, Sci-Fi
Alex DeLarge (Malcolm McDowell) is your average eighteen year old boy...if by average, you mean he fully embraces the old ultraviolence and wanders the streets with his three droogs causing havoc and doing whatever he likes; skipping school, breaking and entering, rape, and assault is just another average day in Alex's life. However, when a planned rape turns into an "accidental" murder, things start to turn fowl for Alex. His droogs turn on him and he winds up being caught by the police. He is then taken to a correctional facility where he spends the next few years, puts on the front that he's fully embraced the bible and that he's now a changed man. But when word makes round of the experimental Ludovico treatment, Alex realizes his chance at freedom and jumps through the proper hoops to get out of the penitentiary he finds himself in and get into the experimental facility where he can be "cured."

Alex is promised that he'll be a free man within a fortnight. The treatment consists of a drug known as Serum 114 being injected into the patient before making them sit through short films such as a man being beaten to a pulp, a woman being the sexual victim of several men, and a Nazi concentration camp film set to the soundtrack of Beethoven's ninth symphony. Alex begins to feel sick during the films and the doctors insist that it's part of the cure. Alex's love for music and Beethoven in general become one of the adverse effects of the treatment as the ninth symphony has the same effect on Alex as the urge to beat or rape someone would. Alex soon comes to realize that you can never go home again and that being a free man isn't all it's cracked up to be, especially after a treatment such as this.

It took 37 years after its initial theatrical release and 24 years of being alive on this planet (the original viewing of this film was in 2008) to finally get around to seeing A Clockwork Orange. The film starts and it makes the viewer feel like they've missed something entirely that everyone else already knows about, but as the film unravels it snowballs into a unique vision of cinema. There are shades of Altered States in A Clockwork Orange, but A Clockwork Orange feels much more polarizing in its presentation in comparison. Stanley Kubrick tries to shine this spotlight of beauty onto the most heinous of actions as the film’s classical score becomes the soundtrack to ferocious and almost inhuman desires. This is Kubrick’s adaptation of the 1962 novel of the same name written by Anthony Burgess and it’s incredible how the film is able to remain captivating over a two hour period.

The film has a stunning restoration on the two-disc Blu-ray anniversary edition. Kubrick always had a brilliant eye when it came to perspective and camera placement; the majority of that could be contributed to Kubrick’s frequent collaborations with cinematographer John Alcott. The long hallway shots and close-ups on memorably haunting facial expressions are some of the most significant scenes in the film. A Clockwork Orange is loaded with vibrant colors that make every frame jump off the screen despite the film nearing half a century in age. This was the first film to take advantage of Dolby Digital surround sound, which contributes to the film sounding as good as it does.

Even with Stanley Kubrick as director, A Clockwork Orange wouldn’t be the same without Malcolm McDowell. McDowell fits the Alex DeLarge role as perfectly as Robert Downey Jr fits Tony Stark; these actors are these characters. The speeches McDowell gives in the film along with how traumatized he is after the treatment process are two of the biggest takeaways after viewing the film. This was one of McDowell’s first on-screen roles, which is surprising given how enthralling he is. You will never think of, “Singin’ in the Rain,” the same way again after viewing A Clockwork Orange.

A Clockwork Orange is a unique expedition into insanity no matter how you look at it. The dialogue is unusual and the characters are this fantastic blend of bizarre and diabolical, but the film is consistently engrossing and never seems to lag. Prior to 1986, the A Clockwork Orange novel was published in the US without its final chapter and that’s the version of the film Kubrick adapted. Anthony Burgess praised Kubrick’s version of the film despite this, which is more than what Stephen King did with Kubrick’s adaptation of The Shining. Every shot in A Clockwork Orange grabs your attention largely in part to how it’s presented or the colors that leap off the screen. The novel is written in a way that’s difficult to read and that often translates on-screen. Like most of Kubrick’s work, A Clockwork Orange is for a specific audience. It is perhaps what Malcolm McDowell is known best for and probably shouldn’t be recommended to just anyone since it would likely soar over a modern day moviegoer. This isn’t the type of film to have on in the background while you text or play games on your phone. Ultraviolence is something you have to embrace and give your undivided attention to.

This is viewed by some as one of the greatest sci-fi films ever by some, but it isn’t any less pretentious than the rest of Stanley Kubrick’s work. A Clockwork Orange is mesmerizing with a performance from Malcolm McDowell that leaves a long lasting impact, but its affinity to utilize difficult to decipher jargon, nonstop innuendo being slammed into your face, and overuse of animalistic violence shackles the film from being more appealing to a wider audience. From a personal standpoint, A Clockwork Orange is one of Kubrick's best but it's easy to understand why it wouldn't be for everyone.
  
Beasts of the Frozen Sun
Beasts of the Frozen Sun
Jill Criswell | 2019 | Romance, Science Fiction/Fantasy, Young Adult (YA)
10
10.0 (2 Ratings)
Book Rating
The plot - so bloody action-packed that leaves you exhausted at times (3 more)
The Villain - makes you want to fall in love with him but then he does something terrible and you want to dismiss him
The enemies to lovers - the MC's are everything
The writing - Jill Criswell does an amazing job with descriptive text and lyrical writing. I was enthralled throughout.
This book is so underrated and it deserves all the hype!
You can also find this review on my blog: bookingwayreads.wordpress.com

TRIGGER WARNINGS: war, violence, blood, gore, talk of sexual assault, child abuse, emotional abuse, animal violence, animal sacrifice, death of an animal, anger issues, arsony, death, murder, talk of drowning, absent parent, death of a parent, disowning, forced marriage, death of a sibling, manipulation, mind control, slavery, starvation, torture, trauma

REVIEW: First off, I want to say to not let all of those trigger warnings deter you from reading this breathtaking novel. Beasts of the Frozen Sun was extremely well-written and I will keep screaming this from the rooftops for as long as I am alive of how amazing this novel is.

Beasts of the Frozen Sun is loaded with badassery and brutally epic scenes. Also, that cover is one of the most beautiful covers I’ve ever seen. There was complexity to the world-building, relatable characters that you just can’t help but fall in love with, brutal wars and men as monstrous as some of the men in the world today. This fantasy novel was defiantly on the darker side, but it D E L I V E R E D ! And it delivered an immersive read that drowned you in the world until the very end.

Beasts of the Frozen Sun follows Lira, the heroine who is gifted from the gods and goddess’. This gift, the ability to read a person’s soul by just touching their chest, was used by others – mainly Lira’s father and uncle. But then a golden-haired giant washes ashore and Lira decides to help him heal. She hides him away and the two of them grow close, forming a bond that is forbidden by both of their clans. But then, the Dragon comes into the story and Lira is left fighting for her life, Reyker’s soul, and her people’s freedom.

Things I loved about Beasts of the Frozen Sun:
1. The main character being a badass heroine who gets angry when her sword is taken from her.
2. The love interest being a tough “bad boy” on the outside, but deep down he’s a big ole softie.
3. Gods/Goddess’ that walk the Earth with humans (even sometimes messing with them)
4. Magical powers that were once used for evil but now are used for good.
5. The whole ‘pretend to be sick so we can get close’ ordeal.

“Looking into his eyes was like gazing at the ocean – swirling shades of deep cobalt and steel gray. Fathomless. Familiar.”

When each of the characters were introduced, I was amazed at how spectacular, unique, and so very strong each of them were! Lira and Reyker’s bond was intense and absolutely addictive. They are literally EVERYTHING. The two are star-crossed lovers but also enemies to lovers and I NEED MORE OF THEM.

The world is out to keep them apart but the two are magnets. And nothing can keep them apart for very long, not even the world no matter how hard it tries too. Reyker is the beast. He was saved from drowning by Lira, who helped him heal by hiding him away. She teaches him her language and she stands by his side. Even when the rest of the world has chewed him up and spit him back out.

Lira battles with being used and caged. She hates feeling like “property” by her father and uncle. She also refuses to believe that Reyker isn’t worth saving. She is one badass heroine and I strive to be her. Smash these two together and you get one powerful couple!

I also want to take a moment to say that Quinlan has my heart and I need to see more of him in book 2 please dear author! I will pay you in my tears and heart if I have too.

“If I die in a cage tomorrow, or I die in a cage in ten years – what is the difference? A cage is not a life.”

The world-building in Beasts of the Frozen Sun was… OMG seriously some of the best I’ve ever read. With history, there is always brutality and this novel does include that. Death, torture, the treatment of woman were all horrible and at times a bit hard to read but Jill Criswell has such raw talent at describing things that she does an amazing job writing those style of scenes. And with this being a story set back in history, those themes are inevitable. But each theme included, made Beasts of the Frozen Sun seem more and more realistic with each passing page.

The plot of this novel is everything!! Wars to villages raids to snuggles between Lira and Reyker. There was never a boring moment within Beasts of the Frozen Sun. It was packed with so much intensity that at times, it left you a bit exhausted. The plot was also dark and brutal but it fit with the story. This was a bloody amazing action-packed novel of magic and redemption, high stakes and brutal fights, powerful woman and monstrous men.

I am on my first ever book hangover. That ending… Jill Criswell is a cruel woman to leave me hanging in the way she did. But OHMAGAWD, I CAN NOT WAIT for book two of this series. Please, if you only ever pick up one book that I recommend, please please please pick this amazing novel up!

“When that dark womb of stillness engulfed him, he embraced it with a flood of relief. Reyker welcomed whatever torments waited him on the other side of this world, knowing it was nothing less than he deserved.”
  
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Emma @ The Movies (1786 KP) rated Wonder Park (2019) in Movies

Jun 22, 2019 (Updated Sep 25, 2019)  
Wonder Park (2019)
Wonder Park (2019)
2019 | Adventure, Animation, Comedy
Contains spoilers, click to show
First off, this is going to be awash with spoilers because I was absolutely amazed by the reaction I had to it. It's not unheard of for movies to turn out differently to how the trailer portrays them but in this case it felt like a rather low blow. I think there should have been some clues to what lay ahead without having to read reviews.

Second thing to get out of the way... the park is called Wonderland... why is the movie called Wonder Park? Pick one and stick to it!

June and her mum create their very own amusement park, it has amazing rides and its animal mascots love to amuse the crowds as they see the wonders that Wonderland has in store. The pair happily create together until June's mum is too sick to carry on. She needs treatment, which means that June and her father need to hold the fort while she's away. Playing with Wonderland isn't the same without her mother and in that moment she decides to pack everything away. Where fun once stood are now bare walls and a serious June who is hellbent on making sure her father doesn't stumble into anything bad.

What I had expected from the trailers was something comedic, the park was surely run down because June had grown up and make believe wasn't cool anymore... What I was served was something with a much more emotional twist of the knife. As soon as June's mother started looking unwell I knew it would be nothing like I'd expected.

We're never privy to what June's mum has, but the whole illness is a much more "glamorous" version of how real life goes. Ultimately we see her leave for treatment and then she comes back "better". No returning home between treatments, no visiting her at the hospital. In this, illness is obviously treated with magic, and while the film shows the more real aspects of the emotions it glosses over the rest.

Let's go to the cast of characters for a bit, and here comes a massive gripe... The UK version and the US version have a different cast. For whatever reason it's only the US cast that got an IMDb listing so I went off for a Google. Here's a quick comparison:

Peanut - Norbert Leo Butz
Greta - Milas Kunis
Steve - John Oliver
Gus & Cooper - UK version: Joe Sugg & Casper Lee, US version: Kenan Thompson & Ken Jeong
Boomer - UK version: Tom Baker, US version: Ken Hudson Campbell

I am at a loss. This film is absolutely not set in the UK, so why would you sub in a different cast when you have so much talent on the original roster? Suggs and Lee were weak and lacked any kind of dramatic quality. Kenan & Ken... I can hear them in my head now, they would have been wonderful together. I love Tom Baker, but he wasn't right either. It was a rather flat performance that needed a little more pep to boost the slightly bland character. My other query would be why John Oliver was cast as Steve for both versions. After seeing the "backing up" bit in the trailer I had hoped for something better in the expanded scene but no, it really was delivered that badly and the rest of his performance was no different. Having him up against Milas Kunis just added to the disaster, while Greta wasn't a great character Kunis did at least give us a good show.

Back to the story. June is sent off to math camp but on the way she has a panic about what might happen to him while he's on his own. There's actually quite a fun little montage here and that convinces her to get off the bus with the help of her friend so she can return home. Scheme executed she dashes off into the forest to make her way home... ba-da-bing ba-da-boom... magic tree portal.

We find that Wonderland is in tatters because it's cuddly little army of toys are dismantling everything that's fun and sacrificing it to the big black swirling vortex in the sky, a vortex that appeared just after the creative voice stopped whispering design ideas into Peanut's ear for the park... that's right... the swirling doom is June's depression, worry and anxiety caused by her mother going away because of her illness... well, shiiiiiiiiiiiiit.

Of course this movie land though, we know everything is going to get better. Our animal friends go from liking June to hating her when she admits the changes were her fault. She then has to redeem herself and everyone lives happily ever after.

I may be paraphrasing a whole section of the film there but that's the basic gist.

There's quite an odd balance in the film, it feels like we hardly get to see much of the park itself, and certainly not a lot in its full glory. The storyline is quite family heavy which for obvious reasons is a little on the serious side. We chop and change between events so quickly that we don't really get to know any of the characters at all, and it's difficult to see how they thought that was sensible in such a short space of time.

The animation is fine, nothing to write home about, but it just seemed to be a little bland on the scale of things. This is really not to say it's bad, we're just lucky to have so much great stuff around at the moment with a standard that is so high.

Wonder Park seems like it's trying to hit a Disney/Pixar level. The message is a surprisingly emotional one and I was surprised how much it affected me, I honestly don't know how I managed to contain my sobbing and on more than one occasion I had tears streaming down my face... there was nothing I could do about it, and I wasn't the only one.

Sadly overall this is a pretty mediocre film but it was so close to being something wonderful. I enjoyed it but there was a lot that could have made it so much better.

What you should do

All of the kids at the screening enjoyed it, for the adults it may well go either way. It definitely deserves a watch at some point.

Movie thing you wish you could take home

If I could have my own magic marker that requires nothing but imagination, I would be unstoppable.
  
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Versusyours (757 KP) rated The Karate Kid, Part III (1989) in Movies

Nov 7, 2019 (Updated Nov 7, 2019)  
The Karate Kid, Part III (1989)
The Karate Kid, Part III (1989)
1989 | Action, Drama, Family
War on bonsai and sporting decency
Contains spoilers, click to show
I remember this film from a trip to the cinema on its release in 1989 and I recall fly kicking my way out of the cinema and into the mean Scottish streets. I am now at an age where fly kicking would be an effort in itself I decided to review it from my older and more critical eye.

 

It begins with a return to Part 1 to re-establish the bad blood Daniel (Ralph Macchio) and his aging sidekick Mr Miyagi (Pat Morita) have with John “I saw things in Vietnam” Kreese. This part I couldn’t let slide with me this viewing as the attempted punches by Kreese to contact Mr. Miyagi were as expected as Xmas day falling on the 25th of December each year. One failed attempt was followed by the same type of punch and the same outcome of bloody and smashed knuckles and an insurance claim for the car owners. After this we return to the present and a skulking and hobo like Kreese seeks the refuge of his ponytailed, rich and so 80s stereotyped “you know he is evil due to his involvement in toxic waste” comrade from the past Terry Silver.

 

Possibly due to giving him his shampoo and conditioner in Vietnam to maintain his ponytail or his heroics in battle, this remains unknown at this time.

 

What about Daniel and Miyagi you may ask well they are in for an unwelcome surprise when the housing complex they live in has been earmarked for redevelopment. To make matters worse unbeknown to Daniel his Uncle is ill and his mum must have been too busy with this to let Daniel know he is homeless as well as heartbroken after his holiday romance turned sour. Great use of a sentence to end a previous films love interest and subsequent relationship, one of films greatest tricks. At least he has a wad of money for college in his pocket to repair his broken heart. Spoiler alert neither the wad of money and the broken heart are the same for long.

 

So as it stands not much karate from Daniel but the use of Mr. Miyagi’s subtle use of Daniel as a glorified maid still exists as they branch out in the cutting world of Bonsai. Remember that college money well now its rent and utilities money after luckily realising there are no more Bonsai shops in the street and even luckier there is a pottery shop with a young lady for Daniel to obsess over and fight for her honour as he shows a propensity for in the previous films. The fact that she has a boyfriend only spurs Daniel on like the initial film in the series and makes her more desirable in his lusting eyes.

 

Enter the 80s Dragon it a supped up Zach Morris Karate Bad Boy, Mike Barnes who is wearing black to dictate his evil intentions. This guy could spell trouble for Daniel as he has links to Silver and thus the plot to ruin Daniels life and happiness for winning a local karate competition the year before takes seed. As someone who has played sports the format of the All Valley Karate Championship, which has been inexplicably changes to allow the defending Champion to only fight in the final where his battle wary and exhausted opponent will be easy prey for a crane kicking Daniel, makes no sense. Maybe Daniel is sick of being typecast as The Karate Kid but this area of the story annoyed me more than a grown man should as initially Daniel can’t even be bothered to sign up for this one fight but after some lying and coercion and some innocent Bonsai paying the price for The Karateless Kid.

 

More pressure from Barnes and his goons and more Bonsai casualties before Daniel and Mr. Miyagi are split between the tournament and after Daniel decided he will fight that 10 minutes if his life for another sweet trophy. With his training regime disguised as housework and child labour now running low, Miyagi wont train Daniel and thus pushing him into Silvers ponytailed clutches. The once meek and defensive Daniel learns that attack is more effective than Miyagi’s training and with another wooden victim (a repeating plot line in this film) being pummelled and the wax punched off it, Daniel is ready to be the badass he always threatened to be. A night out ends in a broken nose of a Silver bribed punk, Daniel questions who he has become and changes his mind about the tournament once more, only for Silver to admit his true intentions to ruin Daniel as a human being and to avenge John Kreese who is not dead as first explained but high on revenge and the smoking of broken kids karate trophies. They give the new and improved Daniel a beating until appearance of Mr. Miyagi, who may or may not be stalking Daniel, who uses his small but deadly side step and legs to defeat the 3 grown men with ease. There is nothing like a good beating to mend a relationship and together the Bonsai Brothers are back and for the umpteenth time Daniel IS going to defend his title and we all hoped that Barnes would make it through the many rounds to get to the final. Hollywood prevails and after relaxing and watching his potential opponents tiring and having their face smashed in, Daniel like and later day Elvis gets on the stage for a quick round of his greatest hits. In Karate Kid tradition Daniel is good and Cobra Kai are bad, he has honour they are sneaky, they will cheat Daniel wont. Daniel wins as usual and takes his hollow victory and Cobra Kai is no more or until the invention of YouTube at least.

Overall this film fondly remembered until I watched it again. The lack of new ideas left me disappointed and broken like the cliff Bonsai and like that tree I will heal and grow but I will be left with the scars of the better and simple life I used to live. The inclusion of Glen Medeiros on the soundtrack was almost enough to save it and keep it respectable but alas it was not to be, this film is the 80s ponytail of memories; best left cut off.
  
Dirt Dog
Dirt Dog
2021 | Animals, Card Game
My family is a dog family. Growing up I was lucky to live with a Lhasa Apso named Sasha, and a Jack Russell Terrier named Casey. They were both great dogs to grow up with, and since being with my wife we have added a Yorkshire Terrier named Millie and a Powderpuff Chinese Crested named Mojo (who now lives with Laura). So when I saw a game named Dirt Dog that had cute art and was looking for previews, I knew I had to check it out. I mean, my dogs were ALWAYS dirty, so this should be a cinch, right?

Dirt Dogs is a two or four player game where each side will be building an obstacle course through which the other side will run down a quarry animal. The obstacle course is a series of cards with icons needed to satisfy in order to pass, and each dog runner will have stats that correspond to these challenges that can also be manipulated with additional card play.

DISCLAIMER: We were provided a prototype copy of this game for the purposes of this review. These are preview copy components, and I do not know for sure if the final components will be different from these shown. You are invited to back the game through the Kickstarter campaign, or purchase through any retailers stocking it after fulfillment. -T


To setup, set aside the Entrance and Quarry cards from the large deck of brown-backed Burrow cards. Shuffle the Burrow cards to form a draw deck, and shuffle the gold-backed Obedience cards into their own pile. Each player (or team, but for this preview I will be reviewing from a two-player game perspective) will choose a dog breed card to use and place it in front of themselves. The icon on the bottom right hand side of the dog card signifies Moxie and an amount of Moxie tokens (bones) will be collected for use by the player. Reveal and place in an offer 12 Obedience cards to be drafted by the players. During the first round of play one player will be the builder and the other will be the first runner. Each player will draw five Burrow cards to begin and the game may now commence!
Dirt Dog will last three or more rounds (depending on what the players decide) and each round will have the roles of first builder and runner reversed. The builder will assemble an obstacle course of Burrow cards from their hand along with an Entrance to get in and a Quarry at the end. The cards are multipurpose in that the right side of the card lists obstacle tests the dogs will need to meet or surpass in order to clear it, and the left side includes icons that can be used by the runner player to assist their dog in a successful run. Similarly, Obedience cards may be played during the run to help overcome a particularly difficult obstacle, but then it will be unavailable for use to build the subsequent Burrow course.

Once a course has been decided and placed before the runner, they will analyze the tests on each card encountered and use their dog stats in addition to any cards they would like to play from hand. Should a runner successfully complete a course and capture the Quarry at the end they will collect the Quarry card and immediately add Dachshund tokens (weineeples?) to increase their stats per the card for the rest of the game.


Players then switch roles and whichever player ends the round with the most remaining Moxie will win the round and collect the Round Winner token (black animeeple because I can’t make out which breed it might be) notating such. The winner is the player who collected the most Round Winner tokens at the end of the three (or more) rounds!
Components. Again, this is a prototype copy of the game, and as such the components will not be exactly as shown in these photos. That said, for a prototype copy, the components are pretty decent! The cards are all nice, and the art on them is suuuuper cute. The layout of the cards is ok, and the iconography is easy to understand. The tokens and different -eeples are wonderful, though those may be different in the final version. It all depends on Kickstarter success though, folks, so you know the drill with backing games.

Dirt Dog reminds me of a couple games I have played, or at least certain mechanics. The building of the burrow runs reminds me of Boss Monster dungeon building as you are trying to foil the runner’s progress, but they can also use cards from hand to help overcome the obstacles. Also, many games now are including multi-use cards in the design, and I absolutely love it. Having to really determine the best use for a card – now during my run, or later to build a run for my opponent – is a wonderful layer that I enjoy. Of course building up a character’s stats is a mechanic I wish more games used. I mean, what’s the best part about playing RPGs? It’s level-up day!

This one is very cute to play and is quite light. I may have found a winning dog to use every time, but I will not spoil that for you. If it seems to become a problem in your plays, I suggest just removing that dog from those available to help overcome that. Remember – the winner of the round is the dog that ends the round with the most Moxie. That said, I still very much enjoy Dirt Dog. The art is great, features at least one of my previous breeds, and leaves itself open for expansions of new breeds and obstacles to be added later.

If you are looking for a cute dog-themed game with light rules and pretty good replayability, I suggest you check out Dirt Dog. It’s a fun and quick little card game that you can even play with AP-prone gamers as the choices are not necessarily do-or-die. Plus, enjoy the art along the way. It’s very nice. You are invited to back the game on Kickstarter that launches soon! Tell them Purple Phoenix Games sent you or I’ll sick a Jack Russell on your yard to dig dig dig until they wear themselves out. At least, that’s what MY JRT used to do…
  
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Hadley (567 KP) rated Ghost Story in Books

May 14, 2019  
Ghost Story
Ghost Story
Peter Straub | 1989 | Mystery, Paranormal, Thriller
8
6.8 (5 Ratings)
Book Rating
Great story line (1 more)
Great characters
Too many secondary characters (0 more)
Don Wanderley is a writer who happens to meet a supernatural being, and this meeting causes his life to be turned upside down in the novel 'Ghost Story.' Wanderley's brother and uncle both die of strange circumstances, leading him to seek how their deaths came to be. What Wanderley finds is that they were both infatuated with two women: Alma Mobley and Ann- Veronica Moore; Mobley just so happens to be Don's ex-fiance'.

Even if it seems so, Wanderley is not the main character of this book, instead, we meet four older gentlemen who have been friends the majority of their lives: John, Lewis, Ricky and Sears. The four have created what they like to call 'the Chowder Society,' where they meet up in suit and tie at one of their houses to tell ghost stories. Sears tells one ghost story that will haunt them the rest of the book about his time as a teacher in a rural town known as Elmira: "Well, one of the most dreadful things in my life happened to me there, or it didn't happen and I imagined it all, but anyhow it scared the pants off me and eventually made it impossible for me to stay on. This is the worst story I know, and I've kept it locked up in my mind for fifty years."

After that story, strange things begin to happen in Milburn; a farmer named Elmer Scales, reports that his sheep have been slaughtered by having their throats slit and completely drained of blood, but there are no footprints nor blood stains where the sheep were killed: " 'Their throats were cut,' Elmer said to his wife. 'What did I tell you? Some crazyman's been out here. And -' his voice rose ' - a crazyman who can fly, because he didn't leave no prints.' "

When the reader finds out that the four life long friends have a dark secret that has seem to come back to haunt them, we witness them being killed off by a supernatural force, one by one. This story brings not only a great cast of characters and amazing story telling, but also twist and turns that are not seen from a mile away, like most paranormal thrillers have today.

The supernatural force readers are introduced to is a shape shifter, who takes on forms from a werewolf to a vampire " When he took off the dark glasses his eyes shone a uniform golden yellow. " But the book is not lacking on ghosts, either : "Then she saw a figure moving around out there and Nettie, who understood more than even her sister credited, fearfully watched it approach the house and barn. She uttered a few choked sounds, but knew that Rea would never hear them. The figure came nearer, hauntingly familiar. Nettie was afraid it was the boy from town Rea talked about - that wild boy in a rage that Rea had named him to police. She trembled, watching the figure come nearer across the field, imagining what life would be like if the boy did anything to Rea; and then squawked in terror and nearly tipped over the wheelchair. The man walking toward the barn was her brother Stringer, wearing the brown shirt he'd had on the day he died: it was covered with blood, just as it had been when they'd put him on the table and wrapped him in blankets, but his arms were whole."

The entire story takes place in the town of Milburn, with a few scenes outside of it, but because of this, there are so many secondary characters introduced that the reader may find themselves back tracking through the book just to remember who all of them are. On top of that, a lot of the characters are so much alike, that description can't even help tell who is who. Even our four main characters have similar descriptions, other than girth, that it takes a couple of chapters for readers to put a face to a name. Only some secondary characters become important enough to remember near the end of the book, this including a teenager named Peter.

'Ghost Story' is among the few paranormal books that can stand on it's own. There are scenes of hallucination that out-do those of the top paranormal writers of today. One of the most memorable scenes is with the character Lewis: "Lewis moved back and forth on the floorboards, willing his friends to return with the farmer's car. He did not want to look at the covered shape on the bed; he went to the window. Through the greasepaper he could see only vague orange light.. He glanced back at the sheet. 'Linda, ' he said miserably. " - the scene quickly changes - "He stood in a metal room, with gray metal walls. One light bulb hung from the ceiling. His wife lay under a sheet on a metal table. Lewis leaned over her body and sobbed. 'I won't bury you in the pond,' he said. 'I'll take you into the rose garden.' He touched his wife's lifeless fingers under the sheet and felt them twitch. He recoiled. "

When the ghost story is finally revealed from the main characters' past, pieces of the puzzle begin to fit together. To not give away too much, here is a portion of that story: " 'She said she was lonely,' Ricky said. 'Said she was sick of this damned town and all the hypocrites in it. She wanted to drink and she wanted to dance, and she didn't care who was shocked. Said this dead little town and all its dead little people could go to hell as far as she was concerned. And if we were men and not little boys, we'd damn the town too.' "

While our main characters are being killed off one by one, the town of Milburn is going through an odd blizzard that seems to put everyone on edge: " People settled down in front of the television and ate pizzas from the freezer and prayed that the power lines would stay up; they avoided one another. If you looked outside and saw your next-door neighbor fighting up his lawn to get to his front door, he looked unearthly, transformed by stress into a wild ragged frontier version of himself: you knew he'd damage anyone who threatened to touch his dwindling store of food. He'd been touched by that savage music you had tried to escape, and if he looked through your Thermopane picture window and saw you his eyes were barely human."

Although 'Ghost Story' was published in 1979, it still has a big impact on the way the paranormal genre is written today. Straub not only makes a convincing story line, but he also makes characters that the reader can actually care about. Even when we find out what has been going on in the small town of Milburn, the reader can still feel a very real threat from the supernatural force within it. 'Ghost Story' is by far the best paranormal thriller I have ever read. I highly recommend this book to anyone who believes that the past can come back to haunt you.

For more reviews by me, please check out my blog at goreandtea.com
  
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Hadley (567 KP) May 14, 2019

Since my reviews seem to get cut off, you can read the whole review and others at goreandtea.com