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Electric Dragon 80.000 V (2000)
Electric Dragon 80.000 V (2000)
2000 | Action, International, Drama
7
7.0 (1 Ratings)
Movie Rating
Dragon Eye Morrison (Tadanobu Asano, Hogun in the Thor films)) didn’t have a normal childhood. As a young boy, he climbed an electrical tower despite his friends warning him he’d be electrocuted. After the inevitable occurred, Dragon Eye seems to go through electroshock therapy whenever he gets into trouble. These shocking developments usually happen in fights and become more frequent when he gets older. As a result, he’s now charged with 80,000 volts of electricity at all times. He has developed his own version of the therapy that involves bolting himself to a table. The only way he can deal with being charged with this much electricity is by playing his electric guitar. Aside from his unusual self-treatment, Dragon Eye is a lizard expert who has an impressive reptile collection. When one of his lizards goes missing and Thunderbolt Buddha (Mastoshi Nagase, Paterson, The Hidden Blade) steps into the picture, that’s when things get even more bizarre.

Electric Dragon 80,000 V is a beyond weird cinematic experience. It clocks in at a little under 55-minutes, so calling it a full-length movie may be a bit of an overstatement. Written and directed by Gakuryū Ishii (credited as Sogo Ishi, he has also directed Labyrinth of Dreams and Angel Dust), the Japanese film is visually similar to Tetsuo, the Iron Man but is more like an extended music video that collided with the visuals of a live-action anime or manga. Ishii used the leftover funds from Gojoe: Spirit War Chronicle to make Electric Dragon 80,000 V while recruiting Asano and Nagase who were the two main leads in Gojoe.

Having nothing else in common with Gojoe, Electric Dragon 80,000 V is absolutely its own beast. The film’s biggest strength is its cinematography. With Norimichi Kasamatsu (Korean filmmaker Lee Song-il’s 2013 remake of Unforgiven) as the film’s cinematographer, being entirely in black and white allows the visuals of the film to bleed off the screen. Some of the most unique shots are when Dragon Eye is playing guitar as the drastic lighting and creative perspective are just what you’d expect from someone taking all of their frustrations out on a guitar; incredibly angry and in your face. There’s a scene in the second half of the film where Thunderbolt Buddha has gotten Dragon Eye’s full attention and Dragon Eye is moving through rooms without moving himself. He appears to be floating from room to room and it allows you to realize how he’s feeling at that particular point in the film as if it’s all a bad dream.

The music may be what makes or breaks the film for the viewer as it tends to walk a thin line between catchy rock music to nothing but loud, distorted noise with screaming. The film is noisy in every sense of the word. Whenever Dragon Eye starts playing his guitar, it often just sounds like noise. It fits the tone of the film perfectly since it complements the concept of channeling 80,000 volts of electricity through a guitar. That would probably sound more like amplified noise than polished music. If you’re not a fan of loud, heavy music then it may affect your judgment of the film.

Electric Dragon 80,000 V is an unusual gray scale experiment, but it’s certainly innovative and unlike anything else you’ve ever seen. It’s not a remake and it’s not an adaptation. It’s an original film that stands on its own, but its radical plunge into such severe weirdness could be a turnoff for some viewers as its manga inspired influences flow excessively through every frame surrounding every sequence with boisterous and heavy guitar riffs; think like a shorter and black and white version of Scott Pilgrim vs. the World that somehow fused with the FLCL anime. This was discovered while digging through Tadanobu Asano’s filmography and if you’re fan of his stuff, then Electric Dragon 80,000 V comes highly recommended.

Electric Dragon 80,000 V isn’t available to stream anywhere, was never released on Blu-ray (this would be amazing in high definition), and the DVD is out of print. A high quality version of the DVD cover had to be pulled from eBay of all places since Google can’t seem to find one otherwise that isn’t tiny in size. The DVD is available on Amazon from third party sellers for $39.99 plus $3.99 shipping in new condition and $29.98 with free shipping in used condition. A pre-owned DVD is running $69.99 to $79.99 on eBay with free shipping. It does look like someone uploaded a 90-minute version of the film on YouTube with English subs and that looks to be the best way to see the film at the moment.
  
Cartooner: The Fast & Furious Game of Drawing Comics
Cartooner: The Fast & Furious Game of Drawing Comics
2018 | Comic Book / Strip, Real-time
Ok, I need to admit to you all that I am an artist. I am a musician (as we all at Purple Phoenix Games are). Unfortunately, I am nowhere near what anyone would call a competent visual artist (see play pic below for evidence of that). So when I received Cartooner from Japanime Games (thank you!) I was a bit intimidated. I was never good at Pictionary and I thought I was gonna be doomed whilst playing this. If you are like me, please keep reading because I actually did really well with this one.

A typical game of Cartooner will last four rounds and each round will be the same length – five, six, or seven minutes each. During these rounds players will create comics using increasing numbers of panels each round. So Round 1 will be a 2-panel comic, Round 2 will have 4 panels, Round 3 will have 6 panels, and the final round will contain 8 panels to fill with glorious comic gold. This is the basic game flow. Where the actual “game” part comes in is through the use of the two decks of cards.

DISCLAIMER: I do not intend to cover every single rule included in the rule book, but will describe the overall game flow and major rule set so that our readers may get a sense of how the game plays. For more in depth rules, you may purchase a copy from the publisher directly or from your FLGS. -T

Three “Theme” cards are dealt at the beginning of the game to each player, which describe the player’s obsessions. Players score points at the end of each round for including their Themes in the comic. This may sound somewhat easy, but the game comes with about 28,000 Theme cards and the combinations can be pretty wonky. For example, for my first game I was dealt Fear of Growing Old, Infidelity, and Desire to Be Famous. My 10-year old niece was dealt Aliens, Flowers, and Animals. I mean, come on! AND her dad is an art teacher (who also played with us and totally killed the art). So I thought I was beaten before we even began. The three Theme cards kept everyone pretty busy in Round 1, but it was about to get harder.

Round 2 introduces a new element to the game that refreshes every round: “Trend” cards. Whomever scored lowest in the previous round will draw Trend cards (the number of which is determined by which round you are currently playing) and choose cards to enact for the upcoming round. Trends are basically bonus cards that you can attempt to incorporate into your comic for the round to score fabulous amounts of points. These are optional, of course, but really can boost those scores for the round, so are not to be ignored.

At the end of each round players will present and read their comics to the group to be scored. Points are awarded for including your Themes, completing objectives from the Trend cards, and also for filling in every panel on your page – which I thought would be a breeze, but apparently eight panels is way too hard for me because I neglected to draw something in the final two panels. Tally up your points from all the rounds and determine the greatest comic artist at the table (it was me)!

Components. This game is a large pad of paper, 28,000 cards, and cardboard VP tokens. You must supply your own writing utensil. As you can see below, I like to live on the edge and used ballpoint pen for my artwork. The tokens are fine and the cards are of good quality. What I really want to highlight is the pad of paper that is provided. Every game each player will need four sheets of paper from the pad, one for each round. These pages are wonderfully organized and include the game rules at the bottom of each page to remind you of what will score points. This helps you to prioritize your panels to include the most VP-worthy elements and to (hopefully) tell a good story as well.

All in all this is a frantic comic drawing game that will have you pulling out your hair trying to compose a somewhat cohesive short visual story including elements that may not, and probably WILL not, fit into that narrative. It is relatively quick, as long as the presentations and arbitrations are held in check for time. We do not have many drawing games in our collections, and I am overjoyed that we now have an enjoyable representative of the genre. Purple Phoenix Games eagerly awards this one a 10/12. Go check it out and test your own illustration skills.
  
Pixie (2020)
Pixie (2020)
2020 | Comedy, Thriller
8
7.3 (3 Ratings)
Movie Rating
Olivia Cooke - utterly enchanting (1 more)
Just the right balance of black humour and Tarantino-esque violence
Some of the dialogue is hard to catch (0 more)
Once upon a Time in the West... of Ireland
You know sometimes when you see a trailer you think "oh yeah - this is a must see"! The trailer for "Pixie" (see below) was one such moment for me. A spaghetti western set in Sligo? With Alec Baldwin as a "deadly gangster priest"? Yes, yes, yes!

In a remote Irish church, two Irish priests and two "visiting Afghan Catholic priests" are gunned down by a couple of losers in animal masks - Fergus (Fra Fee) and Colin (Rory Fleck Byrne) - over a stash of MDMA worth a million Euros. This reignites a simmering gang war between the gangster families of Dermot O'Brien (Colm Meaney) and Father Hector McGrath (Alec Baldwin). Linking everything together is Pixie (Olivia Cooke), O'Brien's daughter, who has a magnetic effect on men. She is somehow subtly the woman controlling everything going on.

Drawn into the mayhem are hapless teens Frank (Ben Hardy) and Harland (Daryl McCormack) - both of who have the hots for Pixie - who embark on a wild and bloody road-trip around southern Ireland.

Key to your belief in the ridiculous story is that the character of Pixie has to have the beauty and charisma to utterly enslave the poor men she crosses paths with: taking a "Kalashnikov to their hearts" as drug dealer Daniel (Chris Walley) puts it. And Olivia Cooke - so good in "Ready Player One" - absolutely and completely nails the role. I'm utterly in love with her after this movie, and she's thirty years too young for me! There's a sparkle and a mischief behind her that reminded me strongly of a young Audrey Hepburn.

Supporting her really well are the "Harry and Ron" to Cooke's Hermione - Ben Hardy (Roger Taylor in "Bohemian Rhapsody") and Daryl McCormack. And the trio make a truly memorable "love triangle". A bedroom scene manages to be both quietly erotic and excruciatingly funny in equal measure.

The direction here is by Barnaby Thompson, who's better known as a producer with the only previous movie directing credits being the St Trinian's reboots in 2007/09. Here he manages to channel some of the quirky camera shots of the likes of Guy Ritchie and Matthew Vaughn and mix them with the black humour and comedic gore of Quentin Tarantino. The taciturn hit-man Seamus (Ned Dennehy) typifies the comedy on offer, using a Land Rover to drag a poor victim round in a figure of eight on a soggy moor to make him talk!

Where I think the movie wimps out a bit is in an ecclesiastical shoot-out finale. Vaughn's "Kingsman: The Secret Service" set the bar here for completely outrageous and out-there church-based violence. Here, the scene is both tame by comparison (not necessarily a bad thing!), but also highly predictable. Given this is supposed to be "a plan", none of it feels to be very well thought-through! As such, belief can only be suspended for so long.

The visuals and music are fab. The cinematography - by veteran John de Borman - makes the west Ireland coast look utterly glorious and the Irish tourist board must have been delighted. There are also some beautifully-framed shots: a boot-eye (US: trunk-eye) perspective is fabulous, and there's a gasp-inducing fade-back to Pixie's face following a flashback. And a shout-out too to the editing by Robbie Morrison, since some of the plot twists are delivered as expert surprises.

The music - by Gerry Diver and David Holmes - is also spectacularly good at propelling the action and maintaining the feel-good theme.

Where I did have issues was with the audio mix. I'm sure there were a bunch of clever one-liners buried in there, but the combination of the accents (and I've worked in Northern Ireland for 20 years and am "tuned in"!) and the sound quality meant I missed a number of them. I will need another watch with subtitles to catch them all.

Thanks to ANOTHER WRETCHED LOCKDOWN in the UK this was my last trip to the cinema for at least a month: I was one of only four viewers in the "Odeon" cinema for this showing. Because it's a great shame that so few people will get to see this (at least for a while), since its the sort of feelgood movie that we all need right now. Slick and utterly entertaining, I'll quietly predict that this one will gain a following as a mini-cult-classic when it gets to streaming services. Recommended.

(For the full graphical review, please check-out the bob the movie man review here - https://bob-the-movie-man.com/2020/11/02/pixie-once-upon-a-time-in-the-west-of-ireland/. Thanks.)
  
Tides of Madness
Tides of Madness
2016 | Card Game, Horror
As you know, the world of board games is quite vast – there are so many games out there, I feel like I can barely keep up! So oftentimes when I come across a game, it’s not necessarily a new one. Enter Tides of Madness. It maaaay sound familiar, and that is because it is a reimplementation of Tides of Time (which we have reviewed before). Is this just a Cthulhian re-theme of the same game, or does it alter the gameplay at all? Keep reading to find out!

Tides of Madness is a game of card drafting and set collection in which 2 players are trying to amass the most points by the end of 3 rounds. To setup for a game, shuffle the deck and deal 5 cards to each player. Place the rest aside as a draw deck, and place the Madness tokens within reach. Each of the 3 rounds is broken down into 3 phases: Drafting, Scoring, and Refresh. During the Drafting phase, each player will choose one card from their hand to keep, and place it face-down in front of them. Once both players have chosen their card, they will be revealed simultaneously and placed in your tableau. Take the remaining cards from your hand and pass them to your opponent. You now draft another card from this new hand, and will then pass the cards again. Drafting continues in this fashion until both players have no cards remaining in hand.


The next phase, Scoring, now begins. Players check their tableau and take a Madness token for each card with a Madness icon. The player with the most Madness this round can choose to gain an additional 4 VP or heal (discard) one Madness token. An important note – if at any time a player receives 9 or more Madness tokens, they immediately lose the game! So keep an eye on those cards, and know when to heal. Next, players will score the cards based on printed objectives – sets of suits, majority of a suit, etc. Points are tallied on the score pad. Finally, the Refresh phase gets you ready for the next round. Each player collects their tableau and selects one card to keep for the next round, and another card to discard from the game. Players simultaneously reveal their kept card and it starts the round already in their tableau. Players will draw 2 new cards to total 5 in hand, and the next round is ready to begin. Play ends either if a player has 9 or more Madness, or after a total of 3 rounds. After the 3rd and final round, all points are added up and the player with the highest score wins.
So if you’re thinking this game is basically Tides of Time, you’re pretty much correct. The only difference between the two is the concept/mechanic of the Madness tokens. And honestly, I think the inclusion of the tokens elevates the strategy a bit. In Tides of Time, it really is all about set collection. But with Madness tokens, you’ve got some risk/reward balance to play with. Do you take a card to complete a set even though it gives you a Madness token? Or do you leave it for last so your opponent is forced to take it? The same applies to the extra step in the Scoring phase. Do you risk keeping all your Madness to snag 4 extra VP or is it better (and safer) to heal 1? It just adds another element to the gameplay that makes it feel a little more engaging and exciting than simple set collection.


To touch on components for a minute – this game consists of 18 oversized cards, a bunch of cardboard Madness tokens, a score pad, and small pencil. The artwork on the cards is appropriately thematic and dark, and the text is clear and easy to interpret. The Madness icon on certain cards is a bunch of tentacles on the side of the card, and it is easy to see which cards are affected and which are not. The tokens and score pad are both decent quality as well. Although not 100% necessary, I appreciate the inclusion of a score pad just to help you remember points between rounds. All in all, good production all around.
I have to say that of the two, I prefer Tides of Madness over Tides of Time. You may have noticed that I have rated both games at a 4, but the Madness element in this one just pushes it over the top for me. Both are good games, don’t get me wrong! Either work as a good set collection/drafting game, and are quick to learn and play. Tides of Madness just engages me a little more and that makes the overall gameplay more enjoyable for me. So all in all, Purple Phoenix Games gives this one a maddening 4 / 6.
  
Yummy Yummy Monster Tummy
Yummy Yummy Monster Tummy
2021 | Card Game, Humor, Kids Game
The Kids Table series from Purple Phoenix Games seeks to lightly explore games that are focused toward children and families. We will do our best to give some good insight, but not bog your down with the millions of rules…

In Yummy Yummy Monster Tummy (which, again, I think I will just call “this game” from here on out), players are kids who are visiting their grandfather and hear noises in the attic. When the kids check out the noises, they find colorful little friendly monsters roaming about! These monsters are all super hungry, and you have found that they love eating items that are the same color as their fur. Oh, but they hate anything considered to be a “vitamin.” Sound familiar, parents?

DISCLAIMER: We were provided a copy of this game for the purposes of this review. This is a retail copy of the game, so what you see in these photos is exactly what would be received in your box. I do not intend to cover every single rule included in the rulebook, but will describe the overall game flow and major rule set so that our readers may get a sense of how the game plays. For more in depth rules, you may purchase a copy online or from your FLGS. -T


To setup this game, first download the official app to your phone or tablet. Yes, an app. Start the app and choose your skill level. Grab all the cards belonging to the Attic set, shuffle them, deal each player the appropriate amount of cards, and place the rest of the deck face-down to form a draw pile. You are now ready to play!
This game is a cooperative game, so players are all trying to win as a team. The whole object of the game is to play cards that will match the monster’s fur that shows up on the app. The color of the cards are very important, as the cards that are played (scanned by the app) will be mixed together to form the new color. So if the monster on screen is red, adding a blue and brown card just won’t do. This not only helps teach colors and mixing, but also encourages cooperation and concentration – something my kids definitely benefit from having in a game.

As the game progresses, other creatures are added that require players to scan other cards, or that give special abilities. I will leave those to you to discover through your plays; I do not wish to spoil much of anything.

Shown below is a screenshot from one of our games, so that you can see what most of the game looks like and how cute the little monsters are.


Players will continue to play cards, draw new cards, and try their hands at mixing the correct colors to match the monster as closely as they can until the app is finished throwing monsters at you. At that time, your success is evaluated and you may even progress to the next mission, or to a new area altogether, adding a new set of cards to the existing deck. This increases possibilities for new color combinations, but also slowly adds in new rules to keep the game interesting and fresh.
My little boy and I have played this game about three million times since we received it from Lucky Duck Games. We cannot get enough of it, and have tried to introduce other players to it with tons of success. The overall premise is very cute and easy to grasp. Even when adding in new creatures and their special rules, he has been handling it remarkably.

I really appreciate the effort that has gone into developing a hybrid app/board game for kids that is just really fun for all who play it. I have seen where this has been redeveloped and rethemed from a different game with more sensitive subject matter. So that’s a boon.

I think the hardest part about playing this game is finding the sweet spot of where to hold the card so that the front-facing camera on the device is able to scan the QR code on the card backs. I know my kid had a difficult time figuring out what “5-10 inches away from the camera” actually meant. An easy fix, and we were on our way to our hundredth play.

If you haven’t had the opportunity to play one of these app-drive hybrid games, I definitely recommend picking up a copy of Yummy Yummy Monster Tummy right away. It is very light, designed for children AND adults, and will provide innumerable hours of quality time with family.

Oh, and don’t worry about reading the rulebook. Just download the app, shuffle the cards, and let the app whisk you away… to your grampa’s attic. Enjoy!
  
Star Wars: Episode IX - The Rise of Skywalker (2019)
Star Wars: Episode IX - The Rise of Skywalker (2019)
2019 | Action, Adventure, Fantasy
There are automatically problems with concluding films in a series, a definite set of things need to be achieved and that doesn't always mean the film can have the same impact as its predecessors. I don't know if this is quite where my struggles with the film came from but it probably didn't help.

I enjoy Star Wars but I wouldn't classify myself as a fan, I like the originals, I've really enjoyed the latest instalments, but I'd happily never watch the prequels again. Rewatching The Force Awakens and The Last Jedi was a joy, I don't remember them being that good, so it was sad to get yet another conclusion this year that didn't leave me with good feelings.

We obviously get the same set of actors doing the usual thing, I wasn't particularly wowed by any of the performances. Adam Driver certainly came across better to me, partly because I finally saw a film of his this year where I felt like he could act, and also because he genuinely had a sound performance through the film.

What appears to be the main theme for our cast is that a lot of them get screwed over. Rose in particular, someone online did the maths, 1 minute and 16 seconds of screen time in a 2 hour and 22-minute film. Her first appearance is so dismissive that it was very clear we weren't going to be seeing her. I'd have felt much better if they hologrammed her from somewhere else in the galaxy being hero own hero and left it at that, or then brought her in at the last minute to Captain Marvel that shit. It felt like a fear of offending the trolls, which is a little redundant considering they were going to go off regardless about something.

Finn and Poe, the ultimate bromance. Every time they appeared onscreen there was the rom-com moment where they'd run into each other's arms and kiss... we were robbed each and every time. With news going around about LGBT representation in RoS we could hope though... but what we got was a token kiss from two extras that didn't feel like it was anything more than ticking the box. R2D2 and C3P0 had a better gay storyline than that kiss did.

Finn didn't exactly get a great life in Rise Of Skywalker, as I sit here thinking about his role the only bit I can recall off the top of my head is that he spent a lot of time trying to tell Rey something yet never managed it. Every time it happened I had an uncomfortable feeling and really didn't want it to be what I thought it was. There are other things that Finn did that I can remember, but for the main thing to be this completely irrelevant piece of story to be number one is a complete joke.

Trying to decipher what happened with the Leia footage has my mind-boggling. They used unused footage from the previous movies and shoe-horned it into the story depending on what they had and could make out of it. With all the technology we have I'm honestly surprised how bad it looked. There's always something slightly off about footage that's doctored like this, Leia didn't look like she was in the same colour palette as the rest of the film in several scenes, and you get back of the headshots to fill the interactions with Rey. I dislike that in most films because actual actor or not it always looks like it's something they've had to re-shoot without the original actor. There's also one scene where we see a young Leia and Luke training, Luke looks quite convincing but Leia's recreation is terrible. Being that there's no dialogue in this bit I'm not sure why they couldn't dig into the archives for something more suitable.

When it comes to effects in the rest of the film it's obviously the usual quality you'd expect, I did suffer a couple of times where scenes were very busy with movement and it set off my motion sickness, those bits might have been dubious but I'd honestly not be able to tell you!

Rise Of Skywalker might have been more aptly named Rise Of The Machines (to steal from another franchise). BB-8 is always adorable, and D-0 was a fun little addition. C3P0 really had some great airtime though, some moments made me laugh, some made me cry, along with Kylo he probably faired the best overall.

As the beginning of the film started so slowly I was concerned about what was in store. Trundling along with nothing seemingly happening I was bored and desperate for something to perk up the pace. Those moments did happen, but with no real flow. It was very much start and stop for a lot of the time, no build-up to the action, no real anticipation so the satisfaction of the scenes were very short-lived.

This year has been the culmination to a lot of movie history and yet again I'm not a fan of it. I don't think that Rise Of Skywalker lived up to The Force Awakens and The Last Jedi, even having watched them all in the same week I wasn't engaged by the final instalment because of the slow beginning.

I can forgive films a lot of things if I enjoy them but the list here was far too extensive to be able to do that. With pacing problems, the box-ticking, and so many characters being let down I've finally come down off the fence and sadly I'm on the disappointed side of it.

Originally posted on: https://emmaatthemovies.blogspot.com/2019/12/star-wars-rise-of-skywalker-movie-review.html
  
The Master and Margarita
The Master and Margarita
7
7.0 (1 Ratings)
Book Rating
In parts laugh out loud funny. (0 more)
You need a degree in the history of the USSR to get all of the in-jokes. (0 more)
Worth a read? Yes. Worth a reread? Maybe not.
Contains spoilers, click to show
The Master and Magarita: Mikhail Bulgakov
Firstly, I didn’t intend to write an essay on this novel. However, once started I found I had a lot to say, and the more I thought about the plot and characters, the more ideas and parallels were sparked, so I am hopeful that the verbosity of this review can be forgiven.
At the risk of sounding both ignorant and uncultured, I found this novel (at least at first) bloody hard slog; not least because the Russian characters have three names, plus a nickname, plus a pun on their name (none of which work particularly well in translation and all of which sound rather similar to the English untrained ear). As an example- Ivan Nikolaevich Ponyrev (who seems to be referred to by any and all of these names) is also known as “Homeless” and “the poet” is a key character in the opening section of the novel. To further demonstrate: there are 17 different names that start with A that are used to refer to 15 different characters with Andreyevich used as the middle name of a bereaved uncle, who makes a journey from Kiev after his nephew is beheaded in a freak tram accident- and Andrey the buffet manager at a Moscow theatre. Clear as mud right? And that is before starting on similarly named characters with the initials M, P, L and S! At my last count there were 45 distinct characters, and I am fairly sure there will be some that I have missed. Hence, I did a lot of re-reading to work out exactly who was doing what to whom.
Additionally, I would suggest you need to be wary of the different translations. The distinct changes in meaning are subtle but important. To triangulate I had three versions at my disposal: Hugh Aplin’s translation (available for free on Kindle), the audiobook version translated by Richard Pevear and Larissa Volokhonsky (which I listened to simultaneously when reading the book to come to my own interpretation, and the subtitles for the Russian TV miniseries from 2005 when I gave up trying to work out who was who from name alone!
So those were my “technical” issues (if you like) with engaging with this novel, and this lack of clarity and understanding (and my own lack of contextual knowledge of Stalinist Russia) meant I missed many of the (what I am sure are hysterically funny to those in the know) satirical jokes in the opening section. That said, the random action and quick changes of focus, undercurrent of chaos in Moscow despite entrenched hierarchal structures and clear threat that (any) one could go missing at any time, for an unclear reason gave a clear insight into the mind and fears of a 1930s Russian citizen. No wonder it was available only in censored form for so long.
Despite these hardships, there were some genuinely laugh out loud moments in the first Moscow based part of the novel. The citizens have not lost their individuality, as they scrabble and fight for bank notes in the theatre, which are later revealed to be worthless. Nor have they lost their sense of pride and vanity, which we see in the female theatre goers, so desperate to attain the fashionable French couture (which later literally disappears from their bodies leaving semi-naked citizenesses desperately trying to cover themselves in a scene reminiscent of “Allo Allo” meets “Benny Hill”). When Professor Woland says his show will “expose” what the locals have failed to realise is that it is their (moral) shortcomings that are about to be revealed. The message is clearly, that no government can successfully legislate against human nature.
Oooh- and another fun fact, apparently Woland (later revealed- or perhaps is implied- to be Satan) was the inspiration to the Rolling Stones 1968 hit “Sympathy for the Devil”, well at least that is what my Google-Fu tells me.
Obviously, there were substantial hurdles to leap, however, I found by the second half of the novel, when we finally meet the eponymous characters, I had got in to the swing of things and begun to embrace the farcical surrealism of the novel.
The second “book” marks a change in tone, although it continues to cut away to scenes of Jesus’ sentencing by Pilate and execution (here known in the Aramaic form Yeshua). Ironically it is these scenes that are the most “real” and substantially human, as Pilate’s decision weighs head achingly heavily on him throughout. The Master and Margarita seem to be the only two characters fully invested in the authenticity of literature, and serve as a counterpoint to the heavily censored “monstrous” writing of Ivan and the rest of the writers’ union Massolit, more interested in fine dining and what their positions can do for them then the production of quality writing.
And it is Margarita’s journey of discovery and liberation from the stodgy, miserable societal expectations of that leads her back to her Master. Bulgakov mixes classical myth, Russian folklore and Bible stories to give us an impression of the timelessness of the central romance. As the worlds of communist Moscow and the inner worlds of the Master and Margarita collide, we are informed of the former’s desire to excuse all magic (and mischief) as the product of mass hypnosis, when the latter (and the reader) are fully aware of the spiritual significance and dimension of the events.
Clever, astute and in places laugh out loud funny, this novel none-the-less requires a level of dedication from the non-Russian speaking reader. Worth a read? Yes. Worth a re-read? Maybe not.
  
Gemini Man (2019)
Gemini Man (2019)
2019 | Action, Drama, Sci-Fi
Special Effects, including Will Smith's "youngification' (0 more)
The script - truly dire (0 more)
Will Smith plays top US hit-man Henry Brogan who is making the world "safer" one bullet at a time! With the mirror telling him his age, Henry hands in his firearm (not withstanding the arsenal under his stairs) to spend more time going fishing and doing the crossword.

But all is not well when Henry's 'one for the road' hit turns out to not be quite what it seems.

Teaming up with marina manager Danny (Danny??) Zakarweski (Mary Elizabeth Winstead), the pair go on the run from operatives of a government-funded black-ops organization called Gemini. Gemini is a private semi-military organization (didn't we just go here with "Angel Has Fallen"?!). These 'baddie goodies' would rather see Henry - and all who know him - fed to the fishes rather than have him catching them.

But one of these guys, under the direct command of Gemini-boss Clay Verris (Clive Owen), looks kinda familiar...

Let's focus on the positives for a minute. This is a spy movie that has all of the polish that the recent "Angel has Fallen" didn't have. Some nice photogenic locations fly in and out again (Georgia, Budapest and Colombia: the latter for no obvious reason I can remember!). It occasionally reminded me of a glossy Bond film, but without Bond.

There are also some high-class special effects (the special effects coordinator is Mark Hawker). A moonlit CGI Gulfstream with a zoom into the cockpit is particularly impressive.

Some of the action set pieces also entertain. A Will-on-Will bike chase is well done, and I've not seen a bike used as a hand-to-hand weapon in this way before!

And Will Smith is no doubt a class act, with his 'youngification' (I'm not sure what the official word is) also being effectively done. I also enjoyed Mary Elizabeth Winstead, who was great in "10 Cloverfield Lane". The lady has real screen presence.

But man oh man, that script. Let's name the guilty parties in this film: the scriptwriters David Benioff (Game of Thrones), Darren Lemke and Billy Ray. (I'll put Ray last in the list, since the story was by Benioff and Lemke and this has the smell to me of Ray - who has a history of some great scripts like Captain Phillips under his name - being drafted in to steady a listing ship).

Some of the dialogue in this film is not just a bit dodgy. It's head in the hands groan-worthy (and I actually did at times: fortunately the cinema was barely half full and I was on my own in the whole row). And some of it is just plain offensive. Henry meets his old pal Jack Willis (Douglas Hodge) on his yacht where he explains his wife is on a trip to Paris as a scantily clad dolly-bird wanders past. Henry comically rolls his eyes at this adulterous behaviour, with some sort of "Jack, what are you loike!" comment. Cringe-worthy.

Will Smith, Mary Elizabeth Winstead and Benedict Wong (their ally, adding some comic relief) are clearly good actors. But the script often makes them look utterly vacuous and stupid. And Lee seems to have a "good enough, move on" approach to the filming. One jaw-dropping moment has Will Smith telling the others that they are going to Budapest. "Budapest?" Winstead and Wong are supposed to say in union, but mistime it. "Can we do that again?". Nope. It's on the screen.

As for Clive Owen... sorry, he's really not in the same acting league, and the script does him even fewer favours. As he says at one point "It's like the Hindenburg crashing into the Titanic". I couldn't have put it better myself.

"Uncanny Valley". You know this phrase. The Princess Leia and Moff Tarkin scenes in "Rogue One" is the classic example. Effects that don't quite work on the big screen. "But" - you say to yourself - "Dr Bob just said that the 'youngification' of Will Smith was done really well?". And I'll repeat again that it was. It's on a par with Samuel L. Jackson's 'youngification' in "Captain Marvel". Where something strange happens is in the film's overall projection. Ang Lee has tried again with his experiment of filming at a massive 120 frames per second..... five times the normal movie frame rate of 24 fps. And the quality of the picture - particularly during high-speed action scenes - becomes outstandingly good! But equally it just doesn't 'look right'.

When the human eye presumably works at an equivalent "fps" of thousands of 'frames per second' you'd think that it should all be fine. But for some reason I just found it distracting. Presumably the audiences for "The Jazz Singer" thought the same about sound; and those for "Gone with the Wind" and the "Wizard of Oz" about colour. Maybe we've seen the future, and its the new norm that we just need to get used to. We'll see.

Ang Lee's "Life of Pi" was extraordinary. His "Hulk" was one of the poorest of the Marvel canon. Unfortunately, this movie is at the "Hulk" end of the spectrum. Which is a real shame. The duo of the 51 year old Smith and the 35 year old Winstead work really well together. They have great chemistry, but, you'll be relieved to hear, avoid any icky love interest.

What a shame. With a different script, and some good production values, this could have been a very different story.

(For the full graphical review, please check out https://bob-the-movie-man.com/2019/10/18/one-manns-movies-film-review-gemini-man-2019/ )
  
Annabelle Comes Home (2019)
Annabelle Comes Home (2019)
2019 | Horror, Mystery, Thriller
God help me I don't know why I went to see this.

The Warrens have contained Annabelle, her influence is safely blocked by a box crafted from sacred glass and they've locked her up in their artefact room. A year goes by without incident, but when their babysitter's friend visits unannounced, curious and looking for answers, the relative peace of the house is shattered.

Daniela unwittingly unleashes Annabelle's power onto the house and the three of them inside. The spirits in the Warren's basement are gradually escaping and coming out to play.

While me and horror don't mix, I do occasionally like the idea behind some of them. A story about objects with power like Annabelle Comes Home really appealed to me as I'm a fan of this sort of supernatural malarkey. As such, I decided to suck it up and be brave. I'm mainly glad I gave it a go... mainly.

This is the first horror film I have ever seen that has had any effect on me after seeing it. Most I just forget about and move on to the next, Annabelle Comes Home really messed with me though. I got up in the night and when I got back to bed I thought about it for the briefest moment and spent the next hour with the light on scrolling through Pinterest. Even when watching it at the cinema there were genuine moments where I was scared, not just the jumping out of my seat kind. Actually, I was impressed that it didn't just rely on the jump scare as a way of getting to its audience. More movies are doing that these days and it just feels like a very cheap way of trying for horror.

The scares here were much more... subtle... but subtle is absolutely not the right words. What I mean is that they were crafted in a much better and natural way than something popping out and screaming in your face. There is a moment with the bride where the shot genuinely moves so swiftly that it's almost inducing panic in you because you can't quite work out what's happening.

All of the spirits in the house are incredibly well done visually. The Ferryman in particular is very effective, it's amazing how something as simple as the sound of coins can add to the tension. When I said "all" at the beginning of this paragraph I did overstate slightly, there's one exception. Sadly Bob (our bit part love interest) is stuck outside trying to fend off a werewolf. I feel like the chances are high that he was designed for a Scooby Doo movie that was never produced. It's got a slightly cartoonish quality to it and when you add in the excess of rolling fog it becomes the least believable of all the unbelievable things.

Speaking of Bob, as a character, while adorable, does feel out of place as well. But the addition of this lighter storyline probably saved me from having a complete breakdown right in the cinema.

Daniela, the girl who can't read warning labels, left me annoyed. She's curious and looking for answers but it also feels like she's not convinced that the Warrens are for real. Either way, why would you play with the thing that is not only inside a locked room, but inside a locked box inside the locked room and has a very clear sign saying not to open it? Surely the only thing that's inside the box apart from a creepy doll and a chair is eternal damnation.

I thought that Madison Iseman as the babysitter Mary Ellen was a really good call in this. She's incredibly believable throughout and managed not to overact. Let's face it, there's always a strong chance of that in horror.

Finding out that Vera Farmiga and Patrick Wilson were barely in it was extremely disappointing. They're both good actors with a host of top roles under their belts and I'd been looking forward to seeing them on screen together. Once the set up is done though it's over to the younger cast members as Ed and Lorraine Warren go off on a trip. They do appear later in the film, but only after the action's conclusion to participate in the bizarrely conceived ending.

Mckenna Grace managed to deal with some of the creepy moments really well but I didn't feel like there was really much for her to do. Everything was very much guided by Mary Ellen and Daniela, and when she did get a moment on the screen it was swiftly snatched away by something else. Potentially by design I guess, but there wasn't much chance to make the role come alive.

I've not seen any of the other films in this franchise, and honestly, probably won't now. If someone who has could tell me if the others are as formulaic as this one I would appreciate it. I'm not saying formulaic is bad, sometimes knowing what's coming is easier to deal with, I'm sure it really helped me with this film. Near the beginning we have a sequence that gives you a checklist of things to wait for. Would I have stuck it out if I hadn't known what to look out for? Would some of those things scared me enough to leave? We'll never know.

I'm glad I managed to stick with it, the idea had been what really intrigued me and I feel like that came through well. Despite other issues with predictability and characters I actually enjoyed this film.

Originally posted on: https://emmaatthemovies.blogspot.com/2019/07/annabelle-comes-home-movie-review.html
  
Disney Shadowed Kingdom
Disney Shadowed Kingdom
2020 | Card Game, Deduction, Memory
You know how sometimes you see a game box and you are just so intrigued and then you realize it uses an IP that you love and you just HAVE to get it? Me too. This is what transpired as I was trying to fill my cart at my favorite online game retailer. I needed something small, I love Disney, and the box art is so good. So I grabbed it. Unfortunately, the box art on this one is probably the best part of this game. Let’s find out why.


In Disney Shadowed Kingdom players are attempting to drive away the darkness of Doubt with the help of Wish (which are both characters, I guess). In order to do this the players will be splitting up within the Magic Kingdom to cleanse the different locations and, with the help of Wish, gain enough Magic to fend off Doubt and the darkness forever!
To setup, each player receives a random (or chosen) Hero Card (in the photo above I was Daisy). The Magic/Shadow Tracker is placed on the table with the tokens on the 0 spaces of each tracker. Place the Wish card on the table. Shuffle the cards and deal each player 10 cards. Each player will then draw the top two cards from their deck, look at them, and then place them face-down in front of themselves on the table. Once done, the play area will be a 2×2 grid of each player’s first draw. The first player will draw two cards from their deck and the second player will draw one. The game may now begin!

On a player’s turn they will take their “oldest” card in their current hand and play it to the table. They may play it to push a card toward their partner to be Discovered, or play it to a side of the grid to push a card outside grid to be Dispelled (discarded). When a card is pushed to a player to be Discovered the discovering player will read the card aloud and follow its directions. Once complete the discovering player takes the card in hand to be used on a future turn. When a card is Dispelled the partner of the active player will NOT play the card for its face abilities, but will rather place it directly in their own discard pile.


When certain location cards are Discovered they may cause the hero’s (the card that was chosen at the beginning) special ability to trigger. These abilities could be peeking at cards in the grid or partner’s hand, or swapping two cards, or other abilities. Play continues in this way until players have pushed enough Magic cards to their partners to win or enough Shadow cards to allow the darkness to invade and lose the game.
Components. This game is a small stack of cards, some Hero cards, and the Magic/Shadow tracker with tokens. The cards are fine quality, the Hero cards are thick cardboard, and the other components are also fine. The art on the cards is amazing, and the saving grace.

Overall I would not recommend this game at all. I only rated it as highly as I did because I love the art and the theme. The gameplay just doesn’t work. There were times, when playing, we would get stuck in a loop of a card telling us to randomize the grid over and over. So while there IS an amount of memory used in the game, it can quickly be thrown out the window with just one card. This is merely one instance of the strategy and tactics needed to win or even play this one: almost none. As you HAVE to play the oldest card in your hand, it becomes a chore to try to remember exactly where it has been placed, and the hope that your partner will not push it toward you to be Discovered. And as bad as that may sound, the other cog in this wonky wheel is that players may not communicate with each other AT ALL. No talking, gestures, reactions, etc. So players are placing cards into the grid to be pushed about without knowing what may be in the grid. Sure, the Heroes all have special abilities, but they are limited to triggering only when one specific location card is Discovered. In a deck of 20 cards, having just one trigger your ability can be frustrating, as that card may never be Discovered in the first place.

When all is said and done, this is a Disney game in name only, and not a great one. The inability to really enact any strategy is severely limiting and thus just presents a game that you play without really making many decisions at all. It’s a guess as to what your partner has played, and “knowing” when to Discover or Dispel is also a crap shoot. Yes, cards on your side of the grid may be known to you, but once your partner pushes cards to you to Discover you no longer know 3/4 of the grid contents. It is just frustrating.

I will probably not be playing this again, and I really don’t see it staying in my collection. It’s sad, really, because this game feels like it should be grander but there are so many missing pieces that is really flops. Purple Phoenix Games gives Disney Shadowed Kingdom a woeful 5 / 12. With so many Disney-themed games out there, and many of them decent to good, pass on this one and grab a different one. I know a few off the top of my head I could suggest. Just message me or email me and I would be happy to recommend some Disney games that are excellent.